DWTS S024, Week 2: Training Wheels Come Off Slowly

We have our first casualty of Season 24 of Dancing with the Stars. And it's a great thing that he's leaving. He was, by far, one of the worst dancers this show has seen.

Ah, but before we get to all that, we have a zillion dances to go through. Let's begin, shall we?

There is no opening number this week, just the dancers coming out. Okay.

First up, in the cavalcade of celebs is Nancy Kerrigan, dancing a cha cha with Artem.

Her biggest detriment at this point is that she appears very insecure. She doesn't seem comfortable with her own sexuality, and everyone knows that #DWTS is about expressing one's own sexuality through dance. (At least.) But she looked great, even if she didn't really own it.

JUDGES' SCORES: 28 out of 40

Let me jump off here with a little aside. I was perusing another DWTS podcast last week, as I was working on my own column, and the girls who did it (millenials) have VASTLY different opinions than I do. For example, one of the things they commented on was how much they "hate" Tom Bergeron (whose name they mispronounced. And they really hated "all his bad jokes." We are obviously of a different generation, because to my ears, every bon mot that Tom utters is something I adore. Seriously. I think he is one of the best hosts on TV, certainly one of the best with the quick comeback to a live TV situation.

For example, this: After Nancy said the sexy was "outside her comfort zone," Tom said, about the upcoming Gleb and Erika (aka sex on wheels), "Last week, Erika and Gleb stayed inside her comfort zone; a zone that happened to include a unicorn..." Made me crack up. LOVE YOU, TOM BERGERON.

This week's fevered sex dream from Gleb and Erika included him as a cop, pulling her over in her Lamborghini (which, you will remember, she promised to give him, if he brings her the Mirror Ball trophy).

Len called it "a Beverly Hills foxtrot," but thanked Gleb for actually putting in some foxtrot steps. (He still didn't like all the sex stuff. And I'm with him. That's Gleb's one thing, apparently.)

JUDGES' SCORES: 28 out of 40

So, at the end, Tom is standing next to the gorgeous Lamborghini, and Tom says, "Erika told me there are no cupholders. And that's a dealbreaker." (I swear, I honestly laugh out loud at each of his asides. It really shocks me that others don't find him funny.)

And then, we have this.

According to IMDB, Charo is 76. Which would make her one of the oldest competitors ever. But it's very interesting to me how others, like David Ross, who is younger than she is, openly talks about his aches and pains, and feelings of growing old. But never once is there any mention of Charo's age. It's probably in her contract.

The dance was barely passable as a dance, you could hardly see anything with all those red ruffles. But at the end, she just went mad. She grabbed Tom's microphone, she told Bruno he needed to work on his English (which made Erin crack up). Tom, afterward brought out the security guard who last season rushed the guy who jumped onstage and subdued him. Tom said this season, he would keep Charo from getting at anyone.

JUDGES' SCORES: 26 out of 40  (Ouch!)

(After she saw her low scores, she started to storm back out on stage. Everyone grabbed her back. It was crazy.)

In the package, they show Nick with his new fiancee, and Peta with her (and Maks') new baby, Chai. Just as I was thinking, wow, that baby has the biggest lower lip I've ever seen on a baby (he was all pouty), Tom says, "Chai kinda looks like Maks when he doesn't like his scores." (Which again, makes me laugh out loud. Like Tom is on it tonight!)

You know, Nick Viall really represents the kind of Dancing with the Stars contestant that there used to be. One who actually had no dance training whatsoever, but for whatever reason finds him(or her)self famous, and giving it a shot on DWTS. And, as such, I find myself, even at this early stage, rooting for him. You can see he's really trying to get these steps right, and I thought his foxtrot was just fine.

Well, that's what I thought. Len thought there was "madness on the floor. There was no control." He wants Peta to pack in less content. Julianne agrees, but "I love this partnership." Carrie Ann thought it had a lot of content, but that Nick should breathe more. Bruno thought it was "too skippy."

JUDGES' SCORES: 25 out of 40  (Seriously? C'mon!)

Really, judges? Charo's fiasco scored higher than this? I don't think so.

Then, we have this.

Poor Maks suffers an injury in rehearsal, which prohibits him from competing. Now, it's interesting to me that when Val had injuries happening to his partner, Tom brought out "the rules" (also, where are these rules exactly?) which said that if she didn't compete (one week), they would both be out of the competition. Those "rules" apparently don't apply to pros.

So we get this. Mind you, with Heather and Maks, I thought they were EASILY going to win this Mirror Ball (almost unfairly, since she had had so much dance training). But here's the thing I didn't realize. People in America are voting, and if they don't love you... or at least recognize your star quality...

Let's just say that what we have now, with this pairing of Heather and Alan, are two people who are proficient and capable as background dancers. So they come out there and do the steps asked of them (as any background dancer does). But do they win our hearts? Do they remember that that is a significant part of this process?

They do a nice flashy jive, in the middle of which, Heather dances with two female troupe members, in an attempt to show her star quality, but she still looks like a background dancer to me.

Len hated it. He thought it was too much hip-hop and not enough jive. The other judges mostly disagreed, although Julianne continued to chastize her for the fact that "ballroom is very different" than what she did previously.

JUDGES' SCORES: 30 out of 40

The downside for this Alan-Heather combo is that this season, there are plenty of other competitors who are great, and have stories that we can root for.

Now, the Sharna and Bonner pairing is one that I really like. This particular Viennese waltz was just beautiful. The costumes, the lighting, the set, the music. Wonderful. My favorite dance so far on this night.

Crotchety Len wasn't moved. "I wasn't transported to Vienna, I was somewhere in the Panhandle." Julianne thinks she can see "something developing" between these two. (wink, wink)

JUDGES' SCORES: 29 out of 40

Oh, man, I adored this dance. It's interesting how this week so many of the competitors struggle to overcome their backgrounds. Simone's issue is to become sexy and not "a gymnast." Although she IS the best gymnast in the world, so Sasha wisely incorporated some neat gymnastic moves into this cha cha. Great, great stuff. And the giant S for Sasha... er, Simone, was great, too.

Len noted (for the first time tonight) that Sasha is "a great choreographer." (And he is. Picks great music, too.) Most of the celebs seem to be struggling with this whole concept of "character." They might be executing the moves ok, but connecting with their emotions, or becoming another character still seems to be pretty foreign to most of them.

JUDGES' SCORES: 29 out of 40

Then, we had Chris Kattan and Witney, dancing jazz to "Hey Ya." Given that he really had a limited range of movement, due to his broken neck (where do they get these people? good grief), it was a lively number, with a storyline of Witney being a Marilyn Monroe type and Chris being her director. But honestly and truly, he is just not in the same league with anyone else who's stepped up here tonight.

JUDGES' SCORES: 22 out of 40

Erin keeps saying: "It was higher than last week." True. Last week, they got fours. This week, it's bumped up to 5s. YIKES.

Yeah, these two: singer in Fifth Harmony and current title-holder of the Mirror Ball, probably have a pretty darn strong edge in this competition. What do you think?

I will put out there the caveat that I really, really, really despise people who agree to do this show (intense rehearsals, performances, etc.) while they are in the midst of doing other things. So Fifth Harmony is currently on a world tour. Which means that Normani and Val are flying around the world, and flying back (absolutely crazy). And like Carrie Ann deducts for lifts, I deduct for busy schedules. CELEB TIP: If you decide to do this show: JUST DO THIS SHOW. Don't do other things. Agree to do it at a time that you're actually available. Is that so hard? *MICHE PET PEEVE*

JUDGES' SCORES: 32 out of 40

And they are now off to China. *sigh*

These two are very much ones to watch in this competition. Great dances, week after week, this week no exception.

Gorgeous Viennese waltz. Emma just packs so much content into it. So beautiful, and sexy. The costumes were great, the set and lighting was spectacular. Just a wonderful dance.

JUDGES' SCORES: 32 out of 40

The less said about this paso doble to "Eye of the Tiger" the better.

JUDGES' SCORES: 22 out of 40

Last dance of the night, David Ross shows us some of his moves from the '90s, as he and Lindsay are "Bustin' a Move." Cool cha cha, much fun.

Julianne reminds us that this is the song she won her Freestyle with in her first season.

JUDGES' SCORES: 27 out of 40

And then, Chris Kattan becomes the season's first casualty. :-(

MICHE'S FAVORITES OF WEEK 2
1. Emma and Rashad's Viennese waltz
2. Val and Normani's cha cha
3. Sasha and Simone's cha cha
4. Sharna and Bonner's Viennese waltz
5. Heather and Alan's jive
6. Lindsay and David's cha cha
7. Peta and Nick's foxtrot

PLEASE GO HOME NOW
1. Charo
2. Mr. T
3. Erika
4. Nancy

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DWTS S024, Week 1: Quite a Bit of Crazy, Quite a Bit of Sublime

The big question on the first episode of any Dancing with the Stars season is: What kind of looney-tunes do they have on this season? And, also, who are the ones who are going to take our breath away?

Well, happily (and sadly) we got the answers to both of those questions in this episode.

Let's start at the beginning, though, shall we?

The season kicks off with a splashy red carpet simulation, the highlight of which is Maks kissing Len on the cheek.

Everyone pairs up with their partner, and the judges come out, all to the opening number dance. Very nice. Bows to the wondrous Mandy Moore for the choreography.

First up in this mega-star parade of dances is our returning champion, Valentin Chmerkovskiy and his new partner, Normani, whose day job is singing in some band called Fifth Harmony. (That was sarcasm, people, don't send me emails.)

"This is going to be like a hybrid of old-school and new-school swagger," says choreographer extraordinaire Val. And this quickstep is indeed that. Beautifully executed, and they look great together.

Tom calls it, "a high-octane start to the season," although Len (back for the full season this time, YAY!) disagrees. "It was a bit long-winded getting started and getting down on this dance floor." (And later, he gives it a 6, which makes Val wince.) Len also said, "You've got to get a bit more body contact going."

JUDGES' SCORE: 27 out of 40

Next up, Artem pairs with figure skater Nancy Kerrigan. We do love Nancy Kerrigan, but it has been awhile since her skates captured our minds and hearts.

They dance a Viennese waltz to Billy Joel's "She's Always a Woman." It ends with flakes of snow tumbling down, and a real skating type of twirl. Nice.

The judges mention her skater's focus, instead of dancer's focus.

JUDGES' SCORE: 28 out of 40

Tom mentions that this show is the 400th! (Congrats, #DWTS!) "But we don't look a day over 380."

And here, we have our first trainwreck. First, Witney is not the smartest of the bunch. Great dancer, but wow, her lack of knowledge sometimes! She has NO IDEA who Chris Kattan is. She says she's never seen an episode of SNL. (Yikes.) And not like Mango is so indelible anyway.

I pretty much like this couple the least of all the ones performing tonight. Did I mention he can't dance either?

One of Carrie Ann's "favorite things in life is goofy bad dancing." So she loved Kattan's routine.

Len takes it further, "If you were trying to do 'goofy bad dancing,' you pulled it off. The best thing about that cha cha is that I haven't got to watch it again."

JUDGES' SCORE: 17 out of 40    :-0

Let's keep another score. Chris Kattan dances... well, "dances," despite having broken his neck earlier in life. Bonner Bolton, the bull rider, also had broken his neck. Luckily for us, he dances better.

Sharna is just cha chaing away in her cowboy boots. This dance was a fun one, and more than one person mentions their chemistry.

Carrie Ann says, "It was like watching Brad Pitt in Thelma and Louise."

Bruno: "How can you resist a cowboy with a killer forward thrust?" (as he's saying this, he's miming a...Ahem...forward thrust... one that makes everyone blush.) I think Bonner got Bruno's vote. Sharna looks beyond embarrassed at what Bruno just said.

Tom: "Seek out the safety of the skybox..."

But in the skybox... Erin, "Carrie Ann mentioned 'oozing,' there was a lot of oozing..." (She says, very slowly...)

Bonner mentions his hat got in the way. Erin, "Oh honey, no one cared about the hat..."

Bonner then thanks his coach, Sharna, "She's been drilling me hard, and working me hard, and cracking that whip." (I so wish I had a picture to put in right here of Carrie Ann's face when he said that!)

JUDGES' SCORE: 22 out of 40

Then, another train wreck. Charo. You remember Charo? She's truly got to be like 100 years old. But she's had a lot of work done, so it's really hard to tell. Charo's schtick, for those who aren't hip to it, is to purposely speak bad English that turns out really sexual in the translation, "I got bumps all over my goose," she says in the package, as she's gyrating her (ancient) crotch. She is an entertainment force of nature (whose time has passed).

Nonetheless, she is now on the show, and she bops through a salsa with Keo and her mile-high hair. As they wait for the judges' scores, she is not patient. At one point, she attempts to charge Bruno, and Tom stops her. Then, when she gets her bad scores, she says: "Why?" in Spanish. (Even though each of the judges has just detailed why.) Tom has quite the ordeal to keep her from going back and punching the judges. "I'm not getting paid enough for this," he pleas.

JUDGES' SCORE: 21 out of 40

Then, we have the most recent Bachelor, Nick Viall, now spreading his ABC franchise coin by trying this Dancing with the Stars thing. *sigh* But, he's paired with Peta Murgatroyd who has been proven to whip a silk purse out of a sow's dancing ear, so who knows? And Peta says she's "defending her title," since the last time she was on the show, she took the Mirror Ball. Then Val won it in between, while she was off having Maks' baby.

But I'll say this right now. People have counted Nick Viall out before, and been dead wrong. I am predicting right now that he goes far in this competition. Much further than many think on the first night.

As he says in the package: "Look out, Mr. T." and "Maks' partner?" Peta: "She was Beyonce's back-up dancer." Nick: "It's gonna really suck for her when we get better scores." Peta laughs. I'm not laughing. He's a very determined man.

Peta: "You'll be like the best Bachelor, that's ever been on the show." Nick scowls and says, "I hope I can aim higher than that."

And indeed, their cha cha was much better than what went before. Course, what went before was Chris Kattan and Charo, so... *shudders*

As they finish, the camera makes a quick cut to our lovely Jenna... who is IN THE AUDIENCE!!! WTF? She's not dancing this season? :-(  That is an extreme bummer.

JUDGES' SCORE: 24 out of 40

So, it's about the halfway point of the first night here. Let me explain something about Dancing with the Stars (if you don't already know this). How it's supposed to work is that you get rank amateurs, who've never danced before, but are famous in SOME OTHER WAY, and prove that they can actually dance.

Somewhere along the way, people decided that they really wanted to see good dance, after all, and those rank amateurs aren't going to do all the flips and spectacular moves that normal people would do, so DWTS has been slowly morphing into something else. It has become about six completely out of the running has-beens who make for good comedy in the beginning, and six actual competitors. USUALLY.

This time around, and I'm always suspicious when this happens, we have A FOR-REAL DANCER. Heather Morris, for those who don't know, was on Glee. However, she was hired onto Glee because SHE'S A DANCER. They already had a bunch of great singers. They needed a great dancer. And she is.

So Julianne and everyone tries to downplay this at the beginning. Oh, BEING BEYONCE'S BACK-UP DANCER is a different kind of dance, it's not BALLROOM. Yeah, um, ok. Shut up.

If there is such a thing on this show as putting one's thumb on the scale, that thumb is Heather Morris. And she's paired with Maks, arguably one of the show's best dancers.

Maks gives Heather a word of encouragement in the package: "Even if you sucked, and this was all a facade, you would have been amazing anyway, because it's ME teaching you."

And it's true. Their Viennese waltz is just a thing of beauty, right out of the gate. Truly miles above anyone else who has just performed. (IMHO)

But Carrie Ann hits on this team's only real drawback: Heather is not a star (like many others on this season are). She's a BACKGROUND dancer. That's what she's good at, supporting others. What will determine if she can win this is if she can step up and own her stardom.

Carrie Ann: "I feel like we got to know everyone else who danced. I don't feel like we got to know you."

Best thing about it: the Tom pinch is back! (Maks likes to pinch Tom's butt.) I missed that!

JUDGES' SCORE: 28 out of 40

I don't know about you, but for me, one of the highlights of last year was the Chicago Cubs being in, and WINNING the World Series. I'm still on a happy high from it, honestly. And anyone who watched knows David Ross for his game-winning homer, in that magical last game. That kind of magic takes you far.

And well, he wanted it to take him to Dancing with the Stars, apparently. Luckily for him, he's paired with the wonderful Lindsay, who does take people quite far, indeed. And David Ross is the first baseball player to compete on DWTS.

They perform a quickstep, fittingly, to the song you heard EVERYWHERE during the Series last year (and in the park in many other years): "Go Cubs Go!" Their names at the opening are on the Wrigley scoreboard. It was so fun.

They also cut to the Cubs at spring training in Arizona, who were watching and cheering David on. That was nice.

JUDGES' SCORE: 28 out of 40

I'm pretty convinced after seeing Gleb awhile now, that his wheelhouse is the sexy thing. That's where he parks it, that's what he does. So this season kicks off with a unicorn (no kidding) and a long-haired blonde with big boobs. Oh joy. There is certainly trepidation on my part, with that shower Argentine tango from last season still burned into my brain, I'm not expecting much.

But Erika Jayne! Wow. Never seen her before, but she is certainly a force to be reckoned with. She does, however, perform this first week to her own song (*Yuck*). "It's Expensive to Be Me."

Not surprisingly, the judges are predictable. Len thought it was "too raunchy." Julianne wanted more salsa content (as did Len). Bruno loved the sex. "It felt like a night in Caligula's palace." Carrie Ann wants her to "go out of your comfort zone. Go more in the elegant zone next week."

JUDGES' SCORE: 24 out of 40

Emma Slater is a hard-working dancer on this show who REALLY deserves a break. She's been saddled with all kinds of people: old, fat, can't move. Never really had a winning combination yet. This one may change that.

She pulls out the "24-Carat Magic" song from the end of last season to do this great cha-cha. It's got attitude, it's got verve. It's a winner.

It starts out with this circle of gold light, that it appears that he's showering in. Gold everywhere. Gorgeous.

Julianne: "I think you've got the magic to make it all the way." She calls it "the dance of the night."

Bruno: "That was the revelation of the night. You were sparkling with star-quality all the way through. I can't believe what I've seen."

Carrie Ann: "You've got the moves, you've got the magic, but now you've got all of our attention. Cause that was killer."

Len, of course, is the wet blanket.

JUDGES' SCORE: 31 out of 40  (Best score of the night so far)

Another one of the joke celebs, especially after that sublime cha cha from Emma and Rashad... It's not even worth talking about this one realistically. Though I do love Kym. Good to see her back.

Len: "The T doesn't stand for 'technique.' "

JUDGES' SCORE: 20 out of 40

Our last competitor follows in the footsteps of last season's winner, Laurie Hernandez, her teammate Simone Biles. They were/are both young, and inexperienced in the ways of the other sex. "Is this the first time you've ever looked into a boy's eyes?" asks Sasha. "Well, you're welcome." (I personally think Sasha is very dreamy.)

They broke out all the stops for this one, with really cool lights.

Incredible tango. For Len, THIS was the dance of the night.

JUDGES' SCORE: 32 out of 40 (highest score of the night).

And at the end, in the closing credits, you see a star for Florence Henderson with "Season 11" at the bottom. Nice.

Here's the way I see the season breaking down from this point.  You have the Chmerkovskiy families (Maksim, Peta and Val) vs. the Farber families (Sasha and Emma).

Those are honestly the ones I see in the final five. Going to be interesting to see who wins.

MICHE'S FAVORITE DANCES OF WEEK 1
1. Rashad and Emma's cha cha
2. Heather and Maks' Viennese waltz
3. Simone and Sasha's tango
4. Normani and Val's quickstep
5. Nick and Peta's cha cha
6. Bonner and Sharna's cha cha
7. Nancy and Artem's Viennese waltz
8. David and Lindsay's quickstep

Yeah... Heather has NO dance experience... *eyeroll*

IN IT TO WIN IT
1. Heather Morris and Maks (seriously?)
2. Normani (from Fifth Harmony) and Val
3. Emma and Rashad
4. Simone Biles and Sasha Farber
5. Nancy Kerrigan and Artem
6. Nick Viall and Peta

Sharna and Bonner

JURY'S OUT
1. Sharna and Bonner
2. David and Lindsay
3. Erika and Gleb

PLEASE GO HOME NOW
1. Chris Kattan *shudders*
2. Charo *shudders*
3. Mr. T

Look who's in the audience? The woman who won (Laurie Hernandez) and the woman who shoulda (Terra Jole).

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DWTS Season 23 Finals, part 2: It's Val and Laurie!

The Grove shopping center is right next to where Dancing with the Stars films. So it's a natural backdrop for their finale, especially around holiday time. I love it. The holiday finales are some of my favorites of this show. So we open on some of the pros dancing through the sparkling, glittering Grove.

Thankfully, the whole concept of "everyone in the cast gets to do a dance" went away with the previous director, and we only SEE each of the season's cast members. Some of whom you had probably surely forgotten were on this season. (Who's that guy with Jenna again?) What is weird though, is that SOME of them do get to perform "their favorite" dances. Others don't (Amber bails on what she said during the show was her least favorite dance, and we get to see the wondrous Jenna dance it instead.). Others have their partners bail inexplicably (see Marilu at the beginning with Derek; when she dances her dance, with Terra and Sasha inexplicably, Marilu is paired with a troupe dancer, and Derek is nowhere to be found). Just weirdness like that through this whole thing.

Tom does his usual spiel, and says that "for the first time ever, the final three are all athletes." Really? A racecar driver counts as an athlete? Hmmm.

So, the scores, they tell us in a nicely done recap of last night are: THIRD PLACE: Lindsay and Calvin with 75, SECOND PLACE: James and Sharna with 77, and FIRST PLACE: VAL AND LAURIE with 78.

Now, in my experience, it's really not often that the addition of the scores from America changes much at this point. (And, indeed, these end up being the final rankings.) But we have this whole finale to go through. So here we go!

First, a look back at the season that was. Back to the first week, and the whole mess with Ryan Lochte, which sadly overshadows that great opening number at Griffith Park. Week Two, TV Night. Week Three and that crazy Face Off nonsense. Then, we have a song (inexplicably) by Andy Grammar. It is notable only for the dance that goes with it, by the wondrous Allison Holker and Keo Motsepe.

You will remember, of course, that when Andy Grammar competed on the show, Ms. Allison was his partner. Always wonderful to see her dance, so this was beautiful.

Then, they start the recap dances, for no apparent reason.

We have Calvin and Lindsay's beautiful Argentine tango (to "Hotel California"). Then Maureen and Artem do a waltz or something (to "You Make Me Feel (Like a Natural Woman)," surrounded by other men from the season.

Then, the always fun blooper reel from the dress rehearsals.

Then, not clear why, Maks dances with women of the troupe. I just realized that this was the dance that Amber so memorably was bitching about having to dance in heels, down stairs. Maybe this was meant for her to dance? In any case, our lovely Jenna did a fine job, having no problem with said heels, or said stairs.

Then, Maks and Val and Laurie do their Trio from the semis, which was wonderful. They improv with Maks and Val together at the end (instead of with Laurie, which is how it was originally), which is funny.

Erin, now outside at the Grove again, talks about the bond that Vanilla Ice and Rick Perry formed on the show (true story). Ice and Witney do their dance to "Ice, Ice Baby," and Rick Perry joins them at the end.

Then they show a bunch of the celebrities and pros who visited Children's Hospital LA, which they've been doing for eight years now. Very nice moment.

Wisely, they chose to not have Babyface dance again, but do what he does best: sing. His lovely partner, Allison, danced with Alan. Beautiful number.

This number was some fun here. Some (not all) of the men of Season 23 and the male pros and troupe members, having some fun with their jackets open. "Yes, please!" as Erin would (and did) say. Although it's unclear why the number was "24 Carat... something" and they come out in silver jackets instead of gold...?

They recap Week Four, which yes, had a double elimination, but what we will always remember as the night that Sasha proposed to Emma. Then Week Five, and Week Six.

Then, Jana and Gleb do that hokey Argentine tango with the water. I didn't like it the first time around. It certainly (to me) wasn't "the hottest Argentine tango ever." (Remember Mark and Paige's Argentine tango? Just sayin'...) Just the wettest.

Then they run through Week Seven through the Semifinals, all of which includes the Team dances, and Halloween, and Sharna's injury, and Jenna filling in. (Props to those who edited these packages. Really nice stuff.)

And now! It's big, it's fantastical, it's choreographed by Mandy Moore. It's a Macy's ad in the middle.

This was truly magic. Part in camera tricks, part amazing dancing. Really stunning stuff. Reminiscent of those big holiday ballet epics, but with a unique #DWTS spin on it.

Then we had a promo for the big DWTS tour, which follows this show in cities across America.

This great photo of Emma and Alan isn't from that dance, but let's just say it was..

Then, we have a judges' look at the final three competitors. Basically, any of these three can do it.

Then, by way of competition, since we really do have three of the best choreographers on the show, we have a fusion challenge (where they combine two styles of dance in one song). Previously, Derek Hough and Mark Ballas were masters at this. I haven't really seen any choreographer match their level yet, although Sharna and Val do come close.

JAMES AND SHARNA
Fusion Challenge: Foxtrot and Viennese Waltz
Scoring: Perfect score (40 out of 40)

I admit it, I always judge competitors by how they react to the final wall when they do this last dance, because the production staff decorates their regular rehearsal rooms with pictures of them throughout the season. The couples who react the best to those items are the ones I most want to win. In this case, Sharna reacted much more to the photos than James. Course, she knows what it means.

Their fusion dance was beautiful.

CALVIN AND LINDSAY
Fusion Challenge: Jive and Quickstep
Scoring: Perfect score (40 out of 40)

Lindsay seems more wowed by the pictures than Calvin. He notes how he had difficulty in the beginning wearing all the sequins that are standard issue at #DWTS.

LAURIE AND VAL
Fusion Challenge: Foxtrot and Argentine tango
Scoring: Perfect score (40 out of 40)

They have many great pictures, and Laurie makes somewhat of a show about how hard it is to not be working with Val anymore. That is short-lived, however, when Tom announces after they dance that, indeed Laurie is going to be joining the aforementioned DWTS Tour, so she'll still be seeing plenty of Val.

For those keeping score at home, based on Judges' scores, the ranking STILL is:

1. Laurie and Val
2. James and Sharna
3. Calvin and Lindsay

Now, the audience votes have to be factored in. Guess how it turns out?

Well, they shuttled the three finalists over to The Grove. Mind you, when they had that "Winter Wonderland" song (that Babyface was singing), they were pumping out the fake snow for a wintry effect (you know it wasn't snowing here in SoCal). It appears whatever they used was slippery, so dancers were slipping, and right before the big announcement, one of the cameramen went flying. Noble Val jumped to help him out.

So, Tom and Erin announce that Calvin and Lindsay have taken third.

This lovely couple took second place.

Oh, and look who won! Congrats to Laurie Hernandez and Val Chmerkovskiy. Well-deserved.

Season 23, a great season of truly amazing competitors.

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