S028 Week 7: Halloween’s Tricks and Treats

 Halloween is always a big event over at Dancing with the Stars, and this week was no exception. We start off with a movie where Len is a chauffeur driver, delivering a coffin. The coffin gets delivered, but along the way we see Tom Bergeron as a quite angry head on a platter, Lindsay and Witney as two very scary sisters, and Val as an elevator operator. Wacky. 

The tableau enters into the DWTS stage, where everyone is fittingly decked out, and we learn that the coffin holds Sean Spicer as (but of course) Frankenstein. Best casting of him so far this season.

Are we having fun yet? I sure hope so.

Witney and Kel, jive

Here’s an example of how often Witney’s choices just don’t work for me. (Compared to Val Chemerkovskiy, who punctuates every word correctly.) Witney has chosen a great song for this jive: “Time Warp” from Rocky Horror Picture Show. But I would bet money that she’s never actually seen the movie, much less the dance in the movie. 

Her concept in this dance is to make them both snakes. Kel asks why, and she says she “just wanted to be weird.” Um… ok. First of all, snakes don’t have feet, and the jive is all about kicks and flicks. #Sigh.

So automatically, this whole concept doesn’t make sense, and “just being weird” isn’t good enough. It’s a lame cop out. To say nothing of how they don’t do the “hands on your hips” part, to say nothing of the “pelvic thrust”—both of which are vital parts of this dance.

Ugh. I just hated this whole lame thing.

Len chastises Tom for “not dressing up” and Tom says he’s a “gray-haired Ryan Seacrest.” (Tom always makes me laugh.)

Len: “I tell you, Kel, you were rocking and I was reeling. It was fast, it was fun, it was fearless. Your feet were right on point, sharp, clear. It was a terrific way to start off the evening.” Bruno: “What a surprising Halloween treat that was.” Carrie Ann: “Everything was so tight, and so clean. 

JUDGES: 27 (out of 30)

Their highest scores of the season.

Emma and James, Viennese waltz

They are dancing this Viennese waltz to “I Put a Spell on You” (he says in the package that it’s the Annie Lennox version, but that doesn’t make any sense, because he’s supposed to bee the one singing it. So I’m going with the original Screaming Jay Hawkins version). So the context  of their story (which actually works, and has thought put into it) is that Emma is in a relationship with Keo, and James is a demon, who tears her away.

Emma’s choreography was just sublime. What an exquisite number! Loved every second, every movement of that. Wow

Bruno: “You are like the Prince of Darkness: mesmerizing, totally in command. It was such a powerful performance.” He mentions a tiny slip up they made. “Until that, it was absolute perfection. It was incredible.” Carrie Ann: “I was dancing with you. It was so flawless, and so powerful.” Len: “Well, James, honestly, you put a spell on me, because I thought the dance was terrific. You had lovely wide elbows, great movement, great footwork. It was a lovely mix of tricks and treats.”  

JUDGES: 27 (out of 30)

Of course, the highlight of any DWTS Halloween show is all the ways that Sasha sneaks around and scares the beejesus out of people. Jenna is the first victim they show. She is NOT happy about it.

Sasha and Ally, tango

Sasha put in lots of content and body contact with our Harley Quinn lunatic. It was a fun tango.

Carrie Ann: “Halloween is on point. Everybody is bringing A game. That was ridiculously good. What I love most about you is the way you dance right on the edge. It makes your performances more visceral. So good.” Len: “Last week, you were nearly dead and buried. And I’m so glad you’ve really come back to life. A terrific tango. I congratulate you, Sasha. Lots of proper dancing. It was so good. What a terrific dance.” Bruno: “Absolutely. That really was a Premiere League tango, with a wicked attitude. The tango was exactly as it should be—full of content, done correctly.”

JUDGES: 27 (out of 30)

Tom: “You have other paddles, right?” LOL

Alan and Hannah, jazz

How perfect is this? Pageant queen gone bad? LOL

In her package, Hannah says: “I’m always gonna be a pageant girl. If you don’t like it, it’s too damn bad.” Here’s my weekly mention of how OVER Hannah Brown I am. All of her schtick bugs the crap out of me. Also, I really hate how Bachelors/Bachelorettes just roll over from one show into another. Haven’t you thought of how SICK OF YOU WE MIGHT BE? UGH. But wait, she doesn’t give a crap. Way to make an audience love you, Hannah.

They are dancing to “Bad Girls,” which, BTW, Hannah Brown will never be. However, I really like how they incorporated the pageant wave into the choreography. LOL And at the end, she puts on her crown, sits on the throne and gives us another pageant wave (as all her competitors are vanquished).

Alan really put together some fun choreography for this dance, and Hannah does strike me as someone who can really do something if she puts her mind to it.

Len: “I think the Bad Girl is a terrific dancer. What I like is that you’ve come out and you’ve performed. You were out there, full on, giving it plenty of welly. I thought you did a terrific job.” Tom echoes: “Plenty  of welly…” Bruno: “Nothing scary about that. It was lively, great performance. Now…you’ve got to be a bit more grounded. Punch it, punch it, punch it, my darling.” Len argues with Bruno: “I thought it was really clear and crisp and on point.” Tom: “Where do you come down, Carrie Ann?” Carrie Ann: “I agree that it was crisp and clear, but I also agree with Bruno. There is something lacking in your performance. You are disconnected from the movements. I need you to give me your heart. You look, and then you look away. You’re not really staying in it. It’s almost like there’s a bit of a shyness in you. You kind of close off to the dance. I want you to stay open. We wanna get to know you through the dance. I want to see layers of you that no one has seen before…” (as she’s saying this, Hannah is closing off…) “I swear, if you let it go raw, we will be here for you.”

(Note the overused word of the night is “terrific.’)

This whole exchange really shows the power of this show, IMHO. And what Carrie Ann is describing is part of what made her so annoying as The Bachelorette. There wasn’t and isn’t really a vulnerability there. Years of forced smiling in pageants does make you close yourself to your own real feelings, IMHO. 

Erin asks Alan what he thought of the comments (about Hannah being “disconnected”). “She has been insecure. But she has no reason to be insecure.” Erin: “I mean, this is free therapy. Enjoy it.”

JUDGES: 25 (out of 30)

Erin asks Hannah how she’s feeling. Hannah: “I told myself that no matter what was said after the performance, to just have fun, and I did have fun.” Erin: “Do you agree at all with what Carrie Ann said?” Hannah: “I think I definitely have more to show and more to give, and I hope I get to do that.” (She says in a really fake, pageant girl way…) 

Jenna and Karamo, paso double

Karamo in his package has a massive pumpkin, compared to Jenna’s tiny one. “Go big, or go home!” says he, “and we are NOT going home this week!” Scary to speak those words on Halloween. You might wanna be careful with that…

I’ll spare you the rest of the lame pumpkin carving exchange… They are dancing to “Survivor” from Destiny’s Child.

As Passos go, this wasn’t one of my favorites, though their makeup is suffifciently Halloween scary. But the shaping was kind of nonexistent, except for a couple poses.

Tom says: “Looking good, Ghoul Brynner.” LOL

Bruno: “No lack of power and purpose in that one. You were really on it. You went wrong once. You should never shorten your shape.” Carrie Ann: “You were like a sonic boom. There’s something about when you release that emotion when you dance, like I was just talking about. You opened up, you let it rip, and it ripped the horns riglht off my head.” Len: “May I just congratulate hair, makeup and wardrobe? They have been fantastic! Plenty of attack, plenty of intensity. It’s the shaping. The shaping in the paso doble has to be a little bit more exaggerated. Having said that, one of the keys to the paso doble is to come out and attack the dance, and that you did.”

Erin: “How do you feel?” Karamo: “I feel like a survivor, who is going to keep climbing to the top.”

JUDGES: 25 (out of 30)

Gleb and Lauren, Argentine tango

Wow. They are dancing “Whatever Lola Want” from Pal Joey. Not what I’d expect from this modest country singer. 

That was really an exquisite Argentine tango. Gleb provided lots of content (and complicated footwork) which Alaina kept up with. Really nice. She did seem to slip once though. :-(  Overall, I seriously think that was one of Glen’s best dances ever.

Carrie Ann: “Can I just say how much I love Halloween? This is incredible. What I see with you is true transformation. You are evolving as a dancer. Every minute, every day. It’s amazing.” Len: “I’m not sure what Lola wants, but I saw plenty of what Lennie wants. You were so full of Argentine characterization. I thought that was wonderful. It was such a spirited performance. I thought the two of you sparked off of each other, and it was a terrific team.” Bruno: “Deadly sexy, irresistible vampire bombshell. The sequence of ganchos you did were exquisite. If Marilyn Monroe was a vampire, doing the Argentine tango, that’s what it would look like, with a little bit of Madonna thrown in.”

Seriously. Drink for every time they say “terrific’ in this show…

Although Carrie Ann mentioned her strong core, Erin discovers that actually Lauren has four “broken” ribs. She said she sprained one the first week of the show, “and I haven’t had the others X-rayed, but they don’t feel great.” 

JUDGES: 27 (out of 30) Well-deserved.

Lindsay and Sean, jive

Man! That is one of the scariest images of the night. And the idea that Frankenstein is going to be doing kicks and flicks scares the crap out of me.

In his package, Sean and Lindsay visit a haunted house and participate in a seance! :-0

Sean: “A guy like Frankenstein and a guy like me both have the same type of natural rhythm and movement.” :-0 (Which is to say… NONE?) He continues: “I don’t know that the spirits can vote for us, but I still want their support.” Um… OK…

Frankenstein dancing to “The Monster Mash,” but of course…

Len: “Well, Halloween is about the supernatural, and this wasn’t super and it wasn’t really natural either. It lacked jive content. You know you’re not the best dancer on the show. But you always come out and you try your hardest and give it your all.” Bruno: “Listen, Sean, the monster part was perfection. The jive was six feet behind. Lindsay, the dance, the production, veery good, very entertaining. Your timing is not your strong suit.” Carrie Ann: “Sadly, that was a dance only your mummies could love. Truthfully, I do feel like you are backsliding a little bit. This was not your best dance. You have done more dances where you were more confident and you didn’t make as many mistakes. I know it’s a lot for someone who’s never performed before, but I do love your spirit. You do come out here, and you never give up.”

JUDGES: 18 (out of 30)

Now, you would THINK that would mean he’s eliminated… #Sigh.

Pasha and Kate, rumba

They do a weird thing in this season, where occasionally they show a detail of how a dance is supposed to go (using pros from the season). Here they show Keo and Daniella (whom Maksim Chmerkovskiy calls the best rumba dancer) doing the rumba. Kate: “Rumba, isn’t that the thing that vacuums?” Pasha: “Exactly, just not as flat.”

Then Kate and Pasha go to an evening Halloween haunt (where they have the same intricately carved pumpkins they showed earlier.

But now, to the dance. So far, Pasha gets the props for best music. They are dancing to “Wicked Game” by Chris Isaak. Nice!

Although it’s kinda bizarre cause Red Riding Hood is now doing sexy time with the Wolf, but… OK. At least it’s not snakes doing the Time Warp inexplicably…

For some reason, Kate seems uncomfortable with the body contact that this dance requires. Although there is some nice choreography in here.

Bruno: “That was a beautiful and haunting rumba. I love the way you’re able to tell a story: you drag us with you. In everything you do, you really capture our attention. Sometimes you lost a little bit of fluidity, but your arm-shoulder extension? So much better.” Carrie Ann: “What I love most when I watch a rumba is to see a woman who feels absolutely 1000 percent confident to do every move. And feeling so good with the choreography that you know you can really get into it. You were oozing this kind of confidence that I love, that only comes—I only see it in Latin and ballroom dancing. And it’s happening right here. What you did was beautiful. Kate, you are shining very brightly.” Len: “Kate, excuse me. Pasha, week after week, you give me routines that you know (all these steps)… you stick ’em in, and I’m just blown away with your choreography.” (Soooooo agree. It’s been really stunning all season.) Len: “What you’ve done, since I admire your dancing and choreography so much, you’ve inspired some of the other professionals to give me proper, authentic routines.” (See Glen’s routine today for proof of this.) Len: “Kate, the trouble with the rumba is that it’s like dancing under a microscope, and any little wobble or anything is magnified. As always, a knockout performance from the pair of you.”

Erin: “Pasha, can I give you some love? This is your first season. Every single week, we’ve seen the growth with her. You deserve this. What’s this experience been like for you? We love having you here.” Pasha: “I’m having a blast. Thank you guys, it means so much to me, all these words. Thank you so much for the support.” Erin: “Every single week, Kate, you’re growing and growing. And you look smokin.’ Let’s get your scores.”

JUDGES: 24 (out of 30)

Then, we have more Sasha scares. LOL (You’d think they’d all be used to it by now…)

And, it’s Halloween, so of course we have Team Dances.

First, the entire cast goes to a creepy warehouse, where they are greeted by a coffin with flowers in it, and a TV nearby, which suddenly bursts alive. Len (in costume) talks to them: “I’ll be splitting you up into two groups: Team Trick, Team Treat for a special Halloween team dance, Pick one of the items on the table…” (oh, sorry, it looks like a coffin) “…and that will determine your fate. We’ll start at the bottom of last week’s Leader Board, and Sean goes first.”

Sean: “I’m ready.” 

Let’s just say that all the good dancers end up on Team Trick, who goes first. 

Team Trick’s song is “Somebody’s Watching Me” by Rockwell. Seriously. Sasha’s on this team. This is almost a gimme. LOL

Great shaping, in this sufficiently creepy dance. Although, back in the day, each team dance used to require separate solos by each couple. That doesn’t appear to be the rule now.

Team Trick

Len: “It was a lovely mix of paso doble, tango, touch of Viennese waltz. But that was all put together with a fantastic, interesting choreography.” Bruno: “I loved it as well, because it was dramatic, but it was elegant at the same time. You managed to combine the two so well, and that little hip hop break you put in, with the girls taking over… Hannah, that’s what I’m talking about, about bringing out the personality. You did it then. So it is there, within you.” Carrie Ann: “I loved it. I love these kind of dances, when you dance in sync like that, where you match each other’s lines. It was really powerful. And Hannah, I did feel it. Did you feel it?” Hannah: “I’m not a performer. I’m a girl on reality TV, and every time I come out here, I’m trying my hardest.” (She actually sounds like she is tearing up, which is actually good.)

Carrie Ann: “You hang in there, cause that’s what we want, more of that.”

JUDGES: 27 (out of 30)

Back when Derek Hugh was here, both teams always got 10s… #sigh

Team Treat

Team Treat dances to “Sweet Dreams” by Beyoncé. Karamo, who LOVES Beyoncé (and just danced to her in his individual dance is “freaking out” at his luck at getting another one to dance to. 

To my eyes (well, first, the song isn’t as good as Team Trick’s was, IMHO) but the dance seemed more awkward, with not as much finesse in choreography. Although they clearly featured all of the “stars” in a solo, which I’m not clear the other group did. (It used to be one of the rules.) But the other dance was better overall.

Bruno: “That was nightmarishly entertaining. What a concept. I have to say not everyone was always on time. But I really enjoyed the effort.” Carrie Ann: “I loved the concept, but I’m gonna give Most Valuable Player to Kate, because you were dancing and keeping up with some of the best lady dancers in this business, and then you wrangled all the men, and you put ’em in place. And then you led that kickline. It was good.” Len: “I liked the fun of it. Wonderful entertainment. Congratulations.”

JUDGES: 24 (out of 30)

Tradition has it that the person going home is also from the losing Team Dance team…

Who gores home tonight? Who are in the Bottom Two? Well, what do you know? Both are from Team Treat.

MICHE’s Favorites of Halloween Night

1. Emma and James, Viennese waltz

2. Gleb and Lauren, Argentine tango

3. Alan and Hannah, jazz

4. Sasha and Ally, tango

5. Pasha and Kate, rumba

6. Jenna and Karamo, paso doble 

Guess he’s not this week’s survivor after all…

***************************************************

S028 Week 6: The Week Inexplicably with No Theme (and Inexcusably)

 
Twenty-eight seasons, each week with a theme, and suddenly they run out of creative juices and have no theme? WT actual F? How ridiculous is this? I know they have a new director, wanting to put his own mark on things, but this was inexcusable. We have weeks we rely upon. But ok, it is what it is, let’s proceeds with No Theme Week (listed on IMDB as simply “Week 6”). Sigh.

Sasha and Ally, quickstep

The wondrous Sasha and Ally start us off in this no theme week by diving into the 80s. They start off with Ally in a blue box (to match her outfit) and Sasha in a yellow box. I don’t know what it was about it, but it really screamed 80s to me. All the creative lights and sets really worked for me too—the squares and circles merging… oh yes, the dance. I personally loved it. I love Ally and Sasha. At the end, Ally slipped a bit, but Sasha caught her gallantly.

They were dancing the quickstep to AHA’s “Take On Me.”

Bruno and Carrie Ann think that Ally “lost synchronicity.” Len disagrees. Carrie Ann: “I love the concept, first of all. It’s very hard to start in two separate areas. You have excelled. The body contact was just gorgeous.” She says that she’s “not going to move her chair” (since she slipped and fell out of it last week). Len shocks Tom Bergeron by being the first to give them a 9.

JUDGES: 25 (out of 30)

Pasha and Kate, Viennese waltz

Don’t they both look so beautiful? I Love this couple. I was rooting so hard for them all season. I really really really wanted them to win. Pasha’s choreography with Kate Flannery was nothing short of brilliant, all season long. Every dance they danced (to me) was magical. And the Viennese waltz? Swoon. It’s so hard to do a proper Viennese waltz. I loved this dance so much.

They danced to Whitney Houston’s “I Have Nothing.” It was breathtaking.

JUDGES: 27 (out of 30)

Kate even says: “Pasha is amazing. He knows how to get me to do what I need to do.” (And she did all those spins while suffering from vertigo.) Wow.

Witney and Kel, quickstep

Maybe this started out as an 80s Week, but then it fell apart? Kel and Witney are dancing to Stevie Wonder’s “Part-Time Lover.” After the sublime pastry that was Kate and Pasha’s Viennese waltz, this seemed like a bit of a mess to me. Didn’t like it at all.

Len: “I thought the routine was terrific. Kel, I congratulate you on your dancing, however, there was a major incident over here. I thought you did an amazing job. Quickstep’s a hard dance. It was fast, it was clean.” This misstep, which Witney blames on her dress (and DWTS always makes dresses too long, and dancers trip over them), makes Witney cry backstage with Erin. Aw. Boo boo.

JUDGES: 26 (out of 30)

Jenna and Karamo, contemporary

Jenna Johnson is the Queen of Contemporary on this show. To my eyes, no one does it better. For me personally though, it’s my least favorite dance on this show. But what they did was beautiful. Very moving. Karamo dedicated it to his dad, whom he had been out of touch with. (Kind of bizarre because they danced to “Someone You Loved” by Lewis Capaldi, and the lyrics are of a romantic nature.)

Lots of folks are getting their first 9s this week.

JUDGES: 25 (out of 30)

Alan and Hannah, samba

The more I think about it, the more MOST of this show seems like it was supposed to be an 80s theme. And then SOME PEOPLE decided not to do that. Yes, I’m looking at you, Hannah Brown, dancing to Carrie Underwood.

Although we do get a primo shirt-ripping-open moment from Alan, so there’s that.

Val and Sailor, jive

Again back to our (possible) 80s theme, we have Val and Sailor dancing a jive to WHAM’s “Wake Me Up (Before You Go Go).”

Vsl Chmerkovskiy is one of the best (if not THE best) choreographer on this show. What I love most about him is that he really HEARS the lyrics and punctuates them in the dance. It’s truly brilliant. Plus, the steps! The choreography in this dance was just amazing. Some of the best jive I’ve ever seen. So damn good. And Sailor kept right up with him. Wonderful dance.

I loved it so much.

JUDGES: 27 (out of 30)

Lindsay and Sean, Viennese waltz

Ugh. Just typing that makes me cringe. Viennese waltz? Sean Spicer? Ugh. Especially after the luminous and wonderful Viennese waltz we had earlier with Kate and Pasha.

As expected, it was a train wreck. Please avert your eyes. Luckily, Lindsay did all the Viennese waltz type steps and Sean mostly walked around. Ugh.

JUDGES: 21 (out of 30)

Emma and James, samba

The lighting designer deserves a medal for this amazing lighting design. (Tell me again how this wasn’t supposed to be 80s Week…)

Ah, but to the samba. It’s wonderful.

Bet you thought James Van Der Beek couldn’t shake his hips, samba-style? Well, you’d be wrong. It was blissful to watch, with all the samba moves you’d expect (and many you wouldn’t). Did you know that people on DWTS rarely incorporate the hand movements that go with samba? Well, James did.

JUDGES: 27 (out of 30)

Erin mentions that they are at the top of the Leader Board. (They are combining last week’s scores with this week’s, since no one went home on Disney Night.)

They deserve it. That dance was really spectacular.

Gleb and Lauren, contemporary

So, one of the things that was lost with this new director is that we used to have a day where everyone got out their emotional stuff, usually in the third or fourth week. The whole night was one of sobbing. I miss that.

This dance hits on many of my DWTS pet peeves: contemporary dance, sobby emotional messes and worst of all, a singer performing their own song. UGH. I was unmoved by this dance.

But let’s proceed.

JUDGES: 26 (out of 30)

Now, at this point, after seeing so many great dances tonight, you’d be thinking: “Well, OF COURSE, Sean Spicer is the one going home. He’s TERRIBLE.” Well, you’d be wrong.

I have learned that when they have these right-wing nut jobs on, there is a large contingent of Americans who vote them up just for sport, irrelevant of how they are actually dancing. Which is truly tragic, and unfair to the great dancers of the night. As is the case tonight.

The two couples in the Bottom Two were people who danced the best tonight: Ally/Sasha and Sailor/Val. As they were announced, I heard America SCREAMING at their TVs: “Not Sean Spicer? WTF?”

Nope. My favorite dancers of the night go home. So sad. And poor Sailor was beside herself. She couldn’t stop crying. Understandably. How can you do so well (and watch someone who clearly sucks) and you’re the one going home? It’s a hard DWTS lesson. Sorry, Sailor. You deserved better.

MICHE’s Favorites of Week 6 (NO theme night, maybe shoulda been an 80s Night?)

1.  Val and Sailor, jive 

2. Pasha and Kate, Viennese waltz 

3. Sasha and Ally, quickstep

4. Emma and James, samba

5. Jenna and Karamo, contemporary

6. Alan and Hannah, samba

**********************************