Season 30, Week Three: It’s Britney Night and Covid Hits One More Time

Last week, as you may remember, Cheryl got Covid, and they did their dance from rehearsal tape. This week, her partner Cody got Covid, so they are again dancing remotely. Also, judge Derek Hough is sitting this one out, “in an abundance of caution.”

Alan and Amanda, cha cha

They dance to something called “Circus” that I’ve never heard of. She does have great legs, and uses them to do amazing splits.

Len: “I was intrigued to find out how you would cope with Latin American dances, because you’ve done ballroom dancing up until now. And I must say, you coped very well. There’s a few dances on this show that I almost know what I’m going to get. There’s nothing spontaneous. And with you, it’s always clean, it’s clear, but it doesn’t really excite me. I wanna get excited.” Bruno: “What a show! What a cha cha cha! First Latin, and you have a hit. You ooze star quality. Those legs, I’m telling you, they are a weapon to be reckoned with.” Carrie Ann: “You are stunning. Normally we don’t use that word for a cha cha, but you are stunning. What I loved about it most was that it was clean, it was sharp, it was elegant. You obviously worked on your technique. But what is lacking, I think, is your posture.”

JUDGES: 24 (Out of 30)

Daniella and Iman, tango

Nice choreeography, as usual, by Daniella. They tango to “Piece of Me.” The height thing, man, whoa! But they work around it nicely.

Bruno: “That was a nice, solid piece of tango. I really appreciate the fact that you are really concentrating on getting the right move. You even tried heel leads. You were in control. You tried to keep your frame. You have to try now to make it a little bit smoother. Drive it through smoothly.” Carrie Ann: “Iman, I did not expect that today. No offense. You know I’m a fan. The way you toned down your steps to match Daniella is so impressive. It’s so hard to do. Your height difference is unbelievable. No one would ever put you guys together in the real world of ballroom dance.” Len: “Unlike Amanda, I’m never sure what’s gonna turn up. Sometimes I think WOW, sometimes not so much. I could see you were trying to work your feet, but they weren’t always fantastic. Let me say: your feet are a long way from your heart, and you always come out and give it your all.”

JUDGES: 19 (Out of 30)

Pasha and Christine, paso doble

Pasha and Christine dance to “Stronger.” I really enjoyed this paso. And the costumes!

Carrie Ann: “Christine, yay! I’m so glad we saved you to see you have this moment. You were fighting for that moment. You were fighting for every step. Your shaping is beautiful. You have such flexibility. You have control. You have everything that it takes to win this competition, and tonight you showed us that you are on your way, girl.” Len: “I was so shocked that you were in the Bottom Two last week. I could not understand it. I’m so glad you’ve come back, because you’ve danced a really clean, crisp, plenty of energy paso doble. It was terrific.” Bruno: “I love it, Christine, when you’re tough. You were in charge of the paso doble. Go for it, honey.”

JUDGES: 21 (Out of 30)

Jenna and JoJo, Argentine tango

Wow! This dance to “Hit Me One More Time” was amazing. They are incredible together.

Len: “It was an extremely well-crafted routine. I liked the lifts, because they were part of the flow of the dance. It had a little bit too much staccato. It looked like a ballroom tango in places. It didn’t have that sort of oozing as that you see in the Argentine tango. Having said that, you can’t make a bad performance. You’re always right on point.” Bruno: “JoJo, you know how to hit it. She goes straight for the bullseye every time. The way she pitches the performance is always the right side of sexy. So titillating. She works the camera like no others.” Carrie Ann: “What I love about you is you’re like liquid sunshine. When you dance, there’s something very powerful about you that’s also so approachable. The most impressive thing that I watched is when you lead. You lead with clarity and intention. It’s so easy to watch. The guys should be watching that too.”

JUDGES: 24 (Out of 30)

Brandon and Kennya, tango

Her dress was gorgeous, but what’s up with that jacket of his? Bizarre. They dance to “Womanizer.” I liked this tango a lot.

Bruno: “My love, you’re back on track! What a good tango that was! It was gliding across the floor beautifully. I never felt like you were pushed by Brandon. You were right up with him. Such poise. Such elegance. That was so chic. I loved it.” Carrie Ann: “It was so chic. It was beautiful. You are so giving supermodel vibes tonight. You’re just so refined and elegant and so strong in your center. That was amazing.” Len: “Your hold was a little bit loose at times. You did lack a little bit of body contact. However, you captured the flavor of the dance, and you moved well around the floor.”

JUDGES: 21 (Out of 30)

Sharna and Brian, tango

In their package, he explains to her the extent of the fame of his show, “Beverly Hills 90210.” “Oh, that’s how famous you were,” she intones. LOL Yeah, he was damn famous. Even more famous than she is now. Pretty funny.

I loved this tango. One of the few where you can really feel the passion between the two dancers. The costumes are fire, too.

Carrie Ann: “Whoa, fire. You have finally arrived in the ballroom, my friend. Now you’re serious. That was serious dancing. I’m very appreciative of the hold and the body contact. It was amazing. I’m so proud of you. Fantastic.” Len: “Your frame was overall good. It was nice. Your body contact was there. Your footwork was pretty poor, actually. But I must say, it was a spirited effort.” Bruno: “He’s right. The footwork. You really have to work on that. You can have all the right intentions, but we are getting toward the middle of the season. You really have to perfect that.”

JUDGES: 19 (Out of 30)

Artem and Melora, cha cha

Melora and Artem dance to Britney’s “Crazy,” and it looks like he was driving her crazy in rehearsal. But she’s a trouper. And she’s here to show you that Amanda isn’t the only one with great legs! Love her costume and her hair.

Len: “That’s the Artem I know and love that gives me a full-on cha cha cha. And that had so much more hip action. It was a great performance.” Bruno: “Wow! Melora, what’s going on? Nothing will contain my excitement. It’s like a veil has been lifted. And I’m actually seeing you in full focus for the first time. You got it, honey.” Carrie Ann: “Melora, at this stage of the game, everybody is starting to stand out for different reasons. What’s so special about you is you make this look easy and natural, when you know it’s nothing but. Somehow you’re able to add light and shade, and you’re not so stiff and tense. That is spectacular.”

JUDGES: 23 (Out of 30)

Gleb and Melanie C., tango

So she’s the flight attendant and he’s the friendly skies? LOL

They dance to Britney’s “Toxic.” Have I mentioned that this season they have all the stars and pros on the sidelines, with drinks and stuff, in little tables? I think they also have their friends and families in a special VIP area with drinks. 

Bruno: “Very impressive cockpit. You were flying high on that tango. And the service? Come on. First-class all the way.” Carrie Ann: “It was so filled with content. That was a hard piece of choreography to learn, and I’m so impressed. Your legs are great, your lines are great.” Len: “Well, it was a bit stop-start. At the end I liked it much more. It took awhile to get cracking. Once you got into the dance, you get into hold, you do a little bit, then you break hold. So it had a jerkiness. Once you got near the end, it was really good. But the bottom line: you are a terrific dancer.”

JUDGES: 22 (Out of 30)

Emma and Jimmie, salsa

They dance to “Outrageous.” Emma’s choreography is pretty amazing. Lots of lifts, beautifully done.

Carrie Ann: “Well Jimmie, first of all, real men do cry. So don’t worry about that. It just shows you’re sensitive. As far as the dance goes, the lifts were super rough. The last one, you nailed.” Len: “Well, I liked the nice easy action of it. It had rhythm all the time. Sometimes your steps were a little bit big. The last lift I didn’t think was in character with the dance, the other ones were a little bit dodgy.” Bruno: “They must’ve been watching another show. Don’t you worry. Because I saw when you let loose, it all flows beautifully. The rhythm, the hips, it was going brilliantly. So listen to reason. And listen to me, that was good.”

JUDGES: 20 (Out of 30)

Val and Olivia, tango

They dance to “Hold It Against Me.” Best tango of the night, also best choreography. Val just creates magic week after week. Amazing tango.

Len: “Listen! Listen to the noise, Val. That was a proper tango. No messing about at the start. Straight into the dance. Full of staccato, full of attack. You pros: THIS is what I wanna see. Not messing about, I want full-on dancing.” Bruno: “You were on it, like a bonnet. I can’t believe it. What I really love about Dancing with the Stars is moments like this, when you see people transforming, in front of your eyes. And you, Olivia, have become a beautiful dancer.” Carrie Ann: “Olivia, you are truly blossoming. That was so far the best dance of the night, as far as I’m concerned. It was fantastic. You are graceful, you are elegant, and you are strong, and you are passionate. All of it together.”

JUDGES: 24 (Out of 30)

Cheryl and Cody, jazz

This week, Cody has Covid. And they are not performing from rehearsal tape, they are performing live on the show, but remotely from their respective homes. It helps that Cody is a Britney super fan. 

As you can see, this time, they both have costumes and makeup.

And given the constraints, I thought it was wonderful.

Bruno: “I really admire the perseverance and the commitment, in spite of it all. I wish you were here. I know you have the ability. It’s very difficult to judge, especially the sync. It’s a very good effort.” Carrie Ann: “Bravo to both of you for dancing with Covid. I know Covid is no joke. So I’m very impressed with both of you. Look, we have to judge it from what we have in this ballroom. And did that compare? Not quite. The truth is, it wasn’t as great as I know you can be. And that’s disappointing. But I’m glad you finally had your Britney moment.” Len: “Well, these are strange times. And they throw out strange scenarios. I wasn’t sure how this would work. I must say: I thought you were clear and tight together. I know it’s difficult, but where you could, you got that little interchange going, with the hat and so on. I thought for the circumstances, you did a terrific job.”

JUDGES: 18 (Out of 30)

Sasha and Suni, foxtrot

They are dancing to “I’m a Slave for You,” and Sasha is the snake. Hahahaha

Carrie Ann: “OK. You’re definitely pushing your boundaries, I can tell you’re going past what’s comfortable with a routine like this. I sense a little bit of discomfort, doing some of the more sensual moves. What I want you to know is that performing like that, you can be innocent and still sensual. And still exude your confidence. And that’s what we’re looking for. I’m very proud of you.” Len: “Not so much for me. You didn’t capture the foxtrot. It’s a romantic dance. This, this was a little bit steamy. First ballroom dance.” Bruno: “Oh, I don’t mind steamy. A bit of moisture makes you glow. I love the fact that you actually started to play with a character. As you let it go, your performance becomes more effective.”

JUDGES: 21 (Out of 30)

Lindsay and Matt, tango

I always think it’s creepy when stars dedicate tangos to their moms. Also creepy is the backdrop of Matt’s abs. Ugh. Didn’t we get enough of that on The Bachelor? Come on. 

They are doing a tango to “Let It All Out,” which I guess he was doing in that backdrop. Oh, they also have b/w glamour shots of Lindsay. Ugh.

I didn’t like the song at all, and didn’t like the dance either. His legs were bent through the whole thing.

Len: “I congratulate you that you got on with it, and it was a full-on routine. You had plenty of passion, and plenty of attack.” Bruno: “I’m a bit disappointed. You’re a bit overdressed tonight. (He’s not showing any chest onstage.) I wasn’t expecting that. But I have to say, you did a very good job. The concentration on his face! You really worked very very hard. Lots of content.” Carrie Ann: “I agree with my fellow judges. You did really well. What I like is there was a new refinement in your dancing. I thought your posture was beautiful.” 

JUDGES: 20 (Out of 30)

Witney and The Miz, salsa

The Miz says he’s going to “outwork everyone.” Considering that Suni, in her package, whined about going to school and doing gymnastics AND doing DWTS, that’s probably not hard.

They are doing a salsa to “Oops, I Did It Again,” which makes Britney fan Witney so happy she jumps up and down. 

Awful lot of flips and spins and lifts in that dance.

Bruno: “When it comes to shirts, less is more. (The Miz has his shirt open. And seriously, Bruno should be taken to HR.) We got the magic. What’s going on? Whatever it is, keep going.” Carrie Ann: “Mike, you’re so much fun to watch. The joy of you. And I see how much attention you put to all the details. The lifts were amazing, some things we’ve never seen before. But I have to tell you, for salsa, I needed to see it more relaxed up here. You were tight.” Len: “Unlike some of our stars, you’ve got absolutely no dance background. And to come out and perform to that level, I thought was fantastic.” 

JUDGES: 22 (Out of 30)

So who’s in the Bottom Two? And who’s going home?

The Bottom Two are Brandon and Kenya and Pasha and Christine. :-(

Going home?

Damn. Bummer. I liked them. Oh well.

Miche’s Favorite Dances of Britney Night

1. Val and Olivia, tango

2. Sasha and Suni, foxtrot

3. Jenna and JoJo, Argentine tango

4. Daniella and Iman, tango

5. Sharna and Brian, tango

6. Alan and Amanda, cha cha

7. Pasha and Christine, paso doble

8. Cheryl and Cody, jazz

9. Gleb and Melanie C., tango

10. Emma and Jimmie, salsa

11. Artem and Melora, cha cha

12. Brandon and Kenya, tango

Need to Go Home

1. Matt

2. The Miz

***************************************************

Season 30, Week Two: First Elimination Is Not a Surprise

Lame intro.

We don’t exactly have an opening number. We have two troupe dancers (Ezra and Sofia), dancing for a bit before they introduce Tyra (who mistakenly introduces them as pros, which they aren’t yet).

Lindsay and Matt, samba

Throughout, they have identifiers under people’s names (in yellow). For some reason, they don’t do this in Lindsay’s package.

They dance to the song whose chorus is: “Come on and dance with me, I’m levitating.” At the point in the song where it goes: “You want me, “ Matt rips off his shirt in front of Bruno. Bruno stands, and nods yes. I think Matt gets a 10 from Bruno for that.

PRO TIP: You do score points with Bruno for this (guys), but it’s points from Len that you really want to worry about. 

It was an OK cha cha. Lindsay working hard to make it so, but Matt’s hips didn’t seem to move at all.

Len (Professional Ballroom Judge): “Instead of worrying about taking off your shirt, which was totally unnecessary, you would’ve been better served working once again on your hips. Your hips are nonexistent. Honestly, your hips are allergic to music. Work on your hips.” Derek (Choreographer & Six-Time DWTS Champion): “I think what Len is trying to say is also work on your balance. In samba, we need balance, we need rise and fall. That gets that hip action going, that rhythm going. Just for the future, think about those feet. That’s going to happen in every single dance. Turn those suckers out. But dude, you’re a great performer, so fun to watch.” Bruno (Film, Music Video & Theatre Choreographer): “There are so many things in my mind that I want to say, nothing to do with the samba whatsoever. (Matt laughs.) Next.” Carrie Ann (Choreographer & Dance Producer): “Amazing physique, but what I was missing was the bravado that you had and the confidence once you ripped your shirt off, it lasted for like two seconds, and then you started dancing small. A little awkward. Keep those feet on the ground.” (Carrie Ann really hates lifts where they don’t belong.)

JUDGES: 22 (Out of 40)

Val (Two-Time DWTS Champion) and Olivia (Beauty Vlogger), Viennese waltz

Gorgeous costumes. Oh, I love people who know how to do Viennese waltz properly. It was just magical. I loved this dance to “Better Days Are Coming.”

Derek: “There is seriously a purity in your performance. When I see you dancing, I don’t see you thinking about the routines, I just see you enjoying it. It’s such a breath of fresh air, you’re like a breeze, dancing across the oak floor. It’s gorgeous. I really, really was impressed with that. Beautiful.” Bruno: “Weightless, flowing, seamless. For a beginner of ballroom, you’ve really done incredibly well. There were a few slight hiccups.” Carrie Ann: “Olivia, I was so impressed with what Derek was talking about. There’s this trust and this vulnerability when you’re dancing, which I’ve seen in the past leads to fantastic endings because it’s all about partnership. With performances like that, your journey will probably not be very short.” Len: “I thought there was nice rotation, to left and to right. I also thought there was a nice mix of steps (thanks, Val) in and out of hold. I thought both of you did a good job.”

JUDGES: 27 (Out of 40)

Brandon (Pro Dancer) and Kenya (“The Real Housewives of Atlanta”), cha cha

These costumes are just fire tonight. Just love them. They dance to Donna Summer’s “Hot Stuff.”

Bruno: “Kenya, let me tell you. You are simply irresistible. Talk about easy. When you got it right, in the second half, it came out of you naturally. This was a night off, but I know what you have is exceptional.” Carrie Ann: “Way to represent. I love it. 50 t0 50 year old. You’re amazing. This season feels very competitive to me, and you have so much going for you, take the extra second to ground yourself, so that the line looks nicer. It was amazing. You were in your power.” Len: “I tell you what you’ve got: plenty of gear in the rear. You were working those hips fantastically. It was such a powerful, full-on dance.” Derek: “Kenya, I love you. You’re absolutely amazing. Beautiful rotation in the grapevines. For me, just find the consistency. There’s moments of greatness in there, and little wobbles here and there. Find that consistency, and you’re gonna be amazing in this show.”

JUDGES: 24 (Out of 40)

Witney (Season 19 Champion) and The Miz (WWE Superstar), tango

They are dancing a tango to “Nothing but a Good Time,” by Poison. The Miz loves “’80s hair metal.”

Boy, this man sure is full of himself. 

Carrie Ann: “That was good. That’s what I’m talking about. That’s what I wanted to see from you. Have the energy in the right parts, entertain us in our face, but then be controlled. It was amazing. You were so distinguished. Your lines were so long.” Len: “Last week I said: ‘Better than expected.’ This week, I got just what I expected. Plenty of attack, very little finesse. However, on a positive, your footwork was very good.” Derek: “My man, you came out of the gate… we doin’ tag team? Let’s go. You got me amped up. I was a little worried you weren’t going to be able to contain that energy when you got into frame, but you did, brother. You were so locked in. I was so impressed. That control was awesome.” Bruno: “You had all that aggression and bravado, but it was very well channeled into a power tango.”

JUDGES: 26 (Out of 40)

Sharna (Season 27 Champion) and Brian, rumba

Their dance last week was pretty steamy, just because they’re a couple. And now a rumba? *fans self*

She says in the package that they are dancing “to our song.” (“Say You Won’t Let Go” by James Arthur) We have an immersive Van Gogh exhibit here in the LA. They go there for their date night, and Sharna says that it’s going to be the backdrop to their dance.

“I’m so in love with you” is one of the lines. And they clearly are.

He mouths the words to her at key moments, it’s like they are in their own little love world, and we’re watching it. It’s so beautiful. So special.

Len: “On a positive note, it had a bit of romance about it. Other than that, there was very little I liked. It was just a load of posing, running around, another pose.” Brian looks shocked at his comments. Derek: “Sometimes you do a dance in the show that’s kinda just for you. I think that’s what this was. I think that’s beautiful. I think it’s great.” Bruno: “It was very honest. It was an honest dance. It was a pure expression of what you feel, and we got that. At times, it felt a little bit good, like a contemporary dance instead of a rumba. It kind of lost the Cuban motion that’s necessary for this. Was it effective? Yes. Not quite right, but great performance.” Carrie Ann: “I think I want you to build on the chemistry that you have. It’s palpable, and it’s beautiful, and it creates amazing moments that maybe other couples won’t be able to create. But you need to sustain the movement. Go from one movement to the other with energy that’s the same as that connection that you have with Sharna.” 

JUDGES: 23 (Out of 40)

Pasha (Pro Dancer) and Christine (“Bling Empire” Star), salsa

They are dancing a salsa to “Despacido.” How could this go wrong? And Pasha just packs his choreography with content. I love it.

Derek: “Wow, Christine. You have an awareness of your body, you know how to use it. You have great hip action. I was really impressed with that. You started really strong, and as it progressed, I could feel a little bit of tension rise up in you, and you could start to feel a little stiff. It’s just the consistency. Everybody’s so talented, there’s so much potential, it’s just keeping all the way from the beginning, all the way to the end.” Bruno: “But Christine, that literally got me on a spin. You have to be consistent.” Carrie Ann: “75% of that was awesome. Your passion is amazing. It brings us all in. I love every move you attack. How you wanted to be on the show, I love that in every move. If you had stayed on your feet, you would have been amazing.” Len: “Tonight, someone is gonna go home. On your two weeks of dancing, I don’t think it’s gonna be you.”

JUDGES: 24 (Out of 40)

Emma and Jimmie (Platinum Country Singer), rumba

They are doing a rumba to one of his songs, “Make Me Want To.” (I don’t like it when they dance to the star’s songs, usually. The advantage, of course, is that they know the musicality of it inside and out. But to me, they are usually not as good songs as are most often chosen.)

The rumba was ok, not earth-shaking.

I’m not commenting on Tyra. Not her dresses, not her excesses, not the lame banter she does before the votes are shown. But I do want to point out that she really does make a lot of mistakes as a host. Mistakes Tom Bergeron never made. Just saying. And her main job is to go: “Bruno, Carrie Ann, Len, Derek” at appropriate times, and she sounds completely bored when she’s doing that. #sigh

Bruno: “Great song, Jimmie. (*eyeroll*) It definitely got you tuned in and turned on. Couldn’t you feel the undercurrent of passion emerging, almost exploding?” (Um, no. To me, it didn’t feel passionate at all.) Carrie Ann: “That was amazing. That was the first time this season that I actually felt my heart attached to what you were doing. You just opened us all up. I could not take my eyes off of you. You had so much respect for the art form by the way you did every movement. I’m impressed with you. That was so beautiful.” Len: “Your footwork was a little bit hit and miss. Your upper body was really great. And the secret to this show: do better than you did the week before. And that’s what you just did.” Derek: “I wanna echo what they just said: the lower half, I could see you struggling a bit, but the upper half, beautiful arms. Powerful.”

JUDGES: 27 (Out of 40)

Alan and Amanda (Co-Host of “The Talk”), foxtrot

Amanda chooses to dance this foxtrot to her wedding dance song with her deceased husband, Nick. “It Had to Be You.”  They chose it because it was the song he sang to book “Bullets Over Broadway,” which was the Broadway show they met in. 

Alan got lucky this time, he got a real dancer. Beautiful foxtrot.

Carrie Ann: “Amanda, with all due respect, so much of your journey has had to do with Nick. But this is all about you. You are a star. That was like watching a Broadway musical built only around you. Those beautiful legs, those beautiful lines. The elegance, the strength, the milking of the moment.” Len: “I love that track, so that helps me. I liked it so much, I wanted it to go on a bit longer, if I’m honest. It was smooth. It was like butter on a hot muffin. Don’t keep kicking your legs up so much. Just cause you got ‘em doesn’t mean you’ve got to use them.” Derek: “Don’t listen to this guy. Use those beautiful legs. They are stunning, exceptional, exquisite. I honestly don’t know what to say, cause I was watching you. I was singing. It was so enjoyable to watch. You are just a vision.” Bruno: “Absolutely radiant. If you’ve got it, flaunt it.” 

The kicks that Len didn’t like.

JUDGES: 32 (Out of 40)

Jenna and JoJo (Popstar and TV Personality), cha cha

Once again, it’s amazing to watch them dance. They dance to “Rain on Me,” and it’s just fun stuff.

Len: “Well, I just saw, before this, my favorite ballroom dance of the season, and I’ve just seen my favorite Latin dance of the season.” Derek: “By the way, that’s all you need. Listen, JoJo, I love you so much. I love your performance, your energy. And I think with you, more is more, right? Sometimes, more isn’t more. You’ve got to contain that energy a little bit. It can get a little wild and lose the quality of movement. There’s an expectation, because you have a dance background. So I think we’re gonna be a little bit tougher on you. Think about that, moving forward. Have that control. Contain that energy.” Bruno: “So crisp, it was crackling. Full of vitality and zest. There was one thing. You have such a strong performance that you pop out of the screen. People are drawn to you. Is absolutely brilliant, what you do. He’s right: sometimes a bit of control. But fantastic job.” Carrie Ann: “It was like watching a dance off, but in all the good ways. Like you weren’t competing with each other, you guys just like outdoing each other, with all that energy. It’s still so new to watch it, I find myself just getting lost in the performance, and going: ‘Wow! This is so awesome.’ You are awesome. You guys are fantastic together.”

JUDGES: 31 (Out of 40

Daniella and Iman (NBA Champion), rumba

According to Maksim Chmerkovskiy (whose dance opinion I value greatly), Lady Daniella is the “queen of the rumba.” They dance to “You Know What’s Up,” by Donald Jones, which Iman says he loves. He’s says it’s on one of he and his wife’s favorite albums. 

Not only is it a great rumba, but the choreography really gets around the massive height differential in really creative ways. (As you can kinda see in the image above.) I loved it.

Derek: “Iman, what I love about you is you just look like you’re enjoying this. And it just makes me enjoy it, and everyone else watching enjoy it. It was just so smooth, so effortless. Dude, that deep lunge?” Bruno: “I really appreciate the work you put into this. You could really see you were trying to follow the melodic line of the music. Very very good work. You still have to work on your feet.” Carrie Ann: “You had more content this week, which was great for Len, but for me, I’m sorry. You have something special. They way you are so able to connect to that music. And you don’t care. You tell your story about what you’re feeling from that music, and to me, that is magic. So once again, that was magic.” Len: “I am smiling. I liked it. Don’t get excited. I didn’t like it that much, but I liked it. It’s a great improvement on last week.”

JUDGES: 25 (Out of 40)

Britt and Martin, cha cha

Poor Britt. To be saddled with such a dreadful partner. I feel sorry for her.

They are dancing to “Twist and Shout,” and I’m truly scared to watch this. Oh, good grief. Ugh. My eyes!

Bruno: “Technically, more content and more steps. Not always in the right ordcr, or have the right time, but definitely more. So, we are moving in the right direction.” Carrie Ann: “I’m just happy for you, because this week, you look like you had fun and you let loose. That’s what people attach to.” Len: “Let me first of all congratulate you, Britt, because I think you’ve done a sterling job working there on Martin. Martin, I can’t give it a big mark because it wasn’t that great.” Derek: “I love the opening James Brown move. I see you, with the footwork there. It was a lot of fun.” 

JUDGES: 15 (Out of 40)

So bizarre seeing a 3 from the judges. (Deserved though.)

Artem and Melora (“The Office” and “The Bold Type” Actress), rumba

Another bit of wisdom from Maksim Chmerkovskiy: the rumba is “the woman’s dance.” Not in this case. For the beginning of the dance, she stood behind Artem. I guess to emphasize the song, “All By Myself” that they were dancing to. But throughout, it certainly felt like Artem was leading and guiding, and she was overall very awkward.

Although I did love the costumes, and she looked very beautiful.

Carrie Ann: “That was very dramatic, sister. I loved it. You have such a knack for storytelling through your body. It’s not just in here (she motions to her face). You’re giving us all with every ounce of your body. Your arms are stunning. What I loved about that performance was it was so well-balanced.” Len: “Overall, it was easy like Sunday morning. However, Melora, you needed a little bit more hips going on, and Artem, I’d have liked a few more recognizable steps.” Derek: “Melora, I adore ya. You’re just so fun to watch. Your movement is beautiful, such quality to it. It has the right amount of resistance in it. Beautiful.” Bruno: “Beautifully acted. Much more centered.”

JUDGES: 27 (Out of 40)

Cheryl and Cody (Celebrity Fitness Guru), salsa

These are COVID times, and our dear Cheryl has gotten Covid. But the #DWTS rules state that the judges can judge from the taped performance from rehearsal. And so they did.

And this salsa was a damn sight better in rehearsal than anything Martin Kove did in performance, I’ll tell you. So I’m extremely glad that Cody is still in the competition with this tape. He was awesome, and would’ve been even better with costumes and lights and whatnot.

Just goes to show: give it your all in rehearsal, cause you never know!

Cheryl and Cody are isolating, because Covid. But they bring them in virtually for their scores.

Len: “May I first say, Cheryl, I wish you a really speedy recovery. That was full of razzle dazzle. A lot of salsa content, which I always like to see. It was crafted well, and it was danced well.” Derek: “Listen, for rehearsal, that was really really good. Obviously, there’s a little parts that are a little out of sync, but that’s what rehearsal is for. I can really imaginc that routine in the ballroom, with the lights, the costumes, you coming alive.” Bruno: “Yes, we really miss you in the ballroom, because that adds an extra layer to the performance. But even the Pepto-Bismol shoes could not take away from your talent.” Cheryl and Cody both laugh. Carrie Ann: “I was gonna say: Let that be a lesson to what you wear in rehearsal, right? Cody, it was a little bit lackluster, but that’s because you’re marking it, but we have to hold it to the standards of what everybody else is doing in the ballroom, so it was a good job. Lots of content, but you know, not fantastic.”

JUDGES: 24 (Out of 40)

Gleb (Season 28 Finalist) and Melanie C., foxtrot

Fun fact: she’s from an area outside of Liverpool, so it’s with special meaning that they are dancing to a Beatles’ song, “Here Comes the Sun.”

Let’s pause for a moment to applaud the tech people on this show, who created such a beautiful sun for us. This just took my breath away.

It was also for my money, every bit as captivating as Amanda’s foxtrot earlier, in some ways more so.

Derek: “Wow. Melanie, you are a gorgeous dancer. Just absolutely stunning. Beautiful resistance in your body. Just so clean, so effortless. You have a beautiful frame. I love watching you dance.” Bruno: “Melanie, my darling, you’ve never looked lovelier. I really was not expecting this. You managed to combine lyricism with dynamics. So clean, so centered. I can’t believe it. Fantastic.” Carrie Ann: “I loved seeing this side of you. There’s such beautiful elegance and refinement and softness. Trust yourself just a little bit more, because you’re a beautiful dancer.” Len: “As you came out, I was thinking of another Beatles song, “Please Please Me,” and you really did please me. This was not “A Hard Day’s Night,” it was good.”

Before the scores are given, we see a video from Ringo Starr, saying “Peace and Love” to Melanie, and wishes her all the best (because he’s from Liverpool too).

JUDGES: 30 (Out of 40)

Sasha (Season 29 Finalist) and Suni, cha cha

Courtesy of Just Jared, and ABC.

Sasha, in the package, tries to fight against the “no smiling” thing that gymnasts have, also the stuffing of one’s feelings. 

Wow! Could Sasha’s pants be any more sparkly?

That aside, I really loved this cha cha.

Bruno: “Going for gold again, are you? BTW, Sasha, those are mine. Suni, when you smile, you shine. Precise, clean. Dance is a performing art. Imagine yourself being a character. Make up a character, and play the character. Become someone else in each dance, because that is the key to project.” Carrie Ann: “I disagree a little bit. I would say, what I saw there was you starting to be a bit more you. And really sort of embracing yourself. I saw you gain confidence. As you gain confidence, the dance became bigger and better and better. I want you to go home, and I want you to watch that dance back. And I even bet next week is gonna be more amazing. Keep on this track.” Len: “Well, we had the lights, we had the cameras, and once you came out, we had the action. Really well danced. I thought you were coming out and performing much better.” Derek: “I feel like the character was Sassy Suni, out there dancing. Can we just talk about that flip, by the way? That’s crazy.”

JUDGES: 28 (Out of 40)

So, who’s going home? GUESS. Well, in all the years I’ ve been watching this show, I’ve never seen anyone have a deficit from 46 to 28 and NOT go home. There aren’t THAT many Cobra Kai fans to overcome this deficit.

But, OK, let’s walk through it. Who are the Bottom Two?

Astonishingly, it’s Pasha and Christine. Not astonishingly, it’s also Britt and Martin.

Who will the judges save? Hahahahahahaha.

OF COURSE, THEY SAVE:

Great final move in Pasha’s choreography.

MICHE’s Favorite Dances of Themeless Week Two

1. Sasha and Suni, cha cha

2. Cheryl and Cody, salsa 

3. Sharna and Brian, rumba

4. Val and Olivia, Viennese waltz

5. Daniella and Iman, rumba

6. Jenna and JoJo, cha cha

7. Pasha and Christine, salsa

8. Gleb and Melanie, foxtrot

9. Alan and Amanda, foxtrot

10. Brandon and Kenya, cha cha

Need to Go Home Soon

1. The Miz

2. Matt James

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Season 29, The Finals! We Have Another Bachelorette Winner

 

An opening number!!!! *jumps up and down*

The four finalists: Kaitlyn and Artem, Jenna and Nev, Sasha and Justina and Daniella and Nelly.

We have two dances (including the Freestyle), a dance by Derek Hough, and Nelly performing for us. Woo hoo. First, though, they do a “Repeat Dance.” Ugh.

Artem and Kaitlyn, Argentine tango

Derek: “Kaitlyn, what a perfect dance to remind people that you deserve to be here, and you are a perfect contender for that Mirror Ball trophy. We’ve held you to a high standard, and I’m glad we did, because you’ve met it. Beautiful performance.” Bruno: “You took my breath away. It was so intensely sensuous, I’m tingling all over. To add to that, the detail was even better this time around. Absolutely stunning.” Carrie Ann: “I’m so glad you chose to do this dance again, because this is the dance where you went from being an amazing dancer to an unforgettable, exquisite… I can’t even find the words right now. What I love so much about this is you challenged yourself. I know I push you, but it’s really you. You pushed yourself, and that’s what you gave us. And this is now one of my Top Three Dances of All Time.”

JUDGES: 30 (out of 30)

Daniella and Nelly, samba

Bruno: “Let’s party with Nelly and Daniella. What you have is such a spontanaeity, a natural feel to you. You’re so engaging to watch. Watching you is great, is fun. We all want to watch you.” Carrie Ann: “Nelly, your journey has been the most fascinating for me and gives me the most joy, because you remind us that dance is so much more than just technique, just the steps, just executing with perfection, as far as the technicality speaking. You showed us that dance is about the joy of life. The transformation that you’ve made has just been incredible. You started this—I wasn’t sure that you were gonna take the full ride. But you took the full ride with us.” Derek: “To echo what she said, this show isn’t just about technique, steps and dance. It’s about moments. And you’re a moment-maker, Brother. You create moments. You fill this room with such joy. People feel good. When I ask people outside the show, ‘Hey, who you rooting for?’ A lot of people say Nelly. You connect with people at home. You did a fantastic job.”

JUDGES: 27 (Out of 30)

Jenna and Nev, paso doble

Previously, the dance (to Swan Lake) started with her at the beginning. This time, it starts with him. Makes more sense.

Carrie Ann: “That dance was perfection the first time you did it. It was once again perfection. There’s no doubt about it. What I love so much about you, is that when I watch you, I feel like I get to have a treat. Whenever you come out on this dance floor, I know it’s going to be amazing. I know it’s going to be technically amazing. I know it’s also going to be artistic. And I know you’re also going to give us 1000%. Thank you for every performance so far.  I’vc loved every performance.” Derek: “I absolutely loved the little change at the beginning, where it was you starting in the spotlight, shedding your light feathers, becoming this dark beast. It was so fantastic. I feel like you kinda catfished us all. Nev Shulmann. You can dance.” Bruno: “How do you improve on perfection? You think about it. You switch the characters, and you created even more dramatic structure. More intensity. It was more thrilling, and you killed it.”

JUDGES: 30 (Out of 30)

Sasha and Justina, cha cha

Go, Justina and Sasha! I’m unabashedly rooting for them.

Derek: “I said it Week One, and I’ll say it again: ‘You are expoloding with charisma.’ You have all season long. You are just sensational to watch. So much fun.” Bruno: “Justina, la diva Latina. You were almost too hot to trot tonight. You brought in the extra spicy sauce.” Carrie Ann: “Girl, you know how to bring it. Every time you hit these hardwood floors, you light them up on fire like nobody else. You have something that is different than everybody because you have fire in a different way. Every single competitor has something so special, and it’s all different. But I love your fire.”

JUDGES: 30 (Out of 30)

Derek dances. Derek Hough’s dances are as gratuitous as Tyra Banks’ dresses.

So back to the show. Onto what we really came here for: the Freestyle dances.

Daniella and Nelly, Freestyle

For me, one of the worst Freestyles I’ve seen in years. Ugh. The less said about it, the better.

Bruno: “The King of Swag and the King of Bling. Great.” Carrie Ann: “If you don’t mind, I’m going to talk a little bit about your partner. This partnership has been outstanding. This dance gives me hope, because it was a hybrid of hip hop and ballroom and Latin. Two worlds that you would not normally put together. You guys brought them together and created something so magical you give me hope for the future.” Derek: “It had everything. The intro was so good. And then the ending. Especially in the Freestyle, it’s so important to start strong and end strong, and that’s what you did.”

JUDGES: 30 (Out of 30)

Artem and Kaitlyn, Freestyle

They danced to “Diamonds Are a Girl’s Best Friend.” (“Sparkling Diamonds” from Moulin Rouge) It was a very fun number, and the troupe (actually pro dancers) helped. Also, back in the day, the Freestyle used to represent the journey that a person had gone through during the season. And it reflected the person, the star. When I think of Kaitlyn Bristowe, “diamonds” aren’t in the top 100 things I’d think about her. So I’m not sure at all where this choice came from. (She’s also not wearing any “diamonds.”)

Carrie Ann: “That is one of my favorite movies of all time. That number is one of my favorite all-time cinema moments. So I have very high expectations. Thank God, you met them. You’re incredible. That you brought that to life, and so much more. I’m so proud of you.” Derek: “I remember watching you, and Chris Harrison surprising you, telling you you were going to be on Dancing with the Stars. Going from a Zoom call on a couch to a ascending down on this giant swing. Here you are on the Dancing with the Stars final. So close to the trophy. Congratulations.” Bruno: “What I liked about it, you really captured the feel of that Baz Luhrmann extravaganza. But it was so jam-packed with content. It was a showcase of Dancing with the Stars.”

JUDGES: 30 (Out of 30)

Jenna and Nev, Freestyle

OTOH, when I heard they were dancing to “Singin’in the Rain,” I got worried. Derek Hough had memorably recreated this dance, even discussing it with Gene Kelly’s widow. It was serious. He went into meticulous detail with his dance.

Jenna and Nev take another tack. They start out the traditional way, perhaps, but then they get into this.

With, of course, actual water involved.

Luckily, there’s also this:

(Which memorably recreates the costumes of Debbie Reynolds and Donald O’Connor.)

So, at least their Freestyle used the actual movie that their costumes are from. As such, personally, I’d give their Freestyle higher points.

Derek: “Listen, you can’t pull off Gene Kelly or Singin’ in the Rain unless you’re a leading man. Nev, my friend, you are a leading man. You bring the best out in Jenna as well. She has done a sensational job all season long. The two of you! What a way to finish out the season. I loved it.” Bruno: “You were aiming very very high with this one. I have to say, you succeeded. That midsection, reinventing the dynamic between Gene Kelly and Cyd Charisse (sic), it was showstopping. It was inspired, it was beautiful. And I was not expecting that.” Carrie Ann: “That was like three routines in one. It was very exciting. Classic, then it got a little raunchy, then the water. So many levels to it. You are an incredible performer. I feel we have said it over and over again, but it’s this partnership that makes it magical. And I just wanna congratulate all of the partners, and the pros, who have done an incredible job this season with all of you.”

JUDGES: 30 (Out of 30)

Sasha and Justina, Freestyle

At least this Freestyle speaks to the person who’s dancing (like it used to be). And isn’t copying some movie from eons ago. (Not that that’s a bad thing.) 

She just looks like she’s having a blast in this dance. Parts of it are in Spanish (of course). Fabulous, and very Justina.

Bruno: “Oh my darling. That really was a celebration of the Latin spirit. The warmth, the passion, the joy, the zest for life. It was so uplifting, I actually hit the rafters (*eyeroll*). It was a tonic for your soul.” Carrie Ann: “I loved that dance. What I loved about it was the message. The Freestyle is all about strategy.  You used this moment to send out a powerful message. It’s a celebration of you, your strength, your courage and your culture.” Derek: “I couldn’t think of a better Freestyle to finish this entire season. That was so good. The intro was fire. All the different things, you guys just crushed it.”

JUDGES: 30 (Out of 30)

MICHE’s Favorite Freestyles

1. Jenna and Nev

2. Sasha and Justina

3. Artem and Kaitlyn

Then Nelly performs some of his greatest hits. Daniella, of course, dances.

 They show clips of everyone’s friends, family and otherwise cheer sections, saying why they deserve the Mirror Ball. 

The couple in 4th place is:

Robbed! They were robbed! :-(

Daniella and Nelly, thankfully, took third place.

Either of these couples could win. I think, based on their Freestyles, that Nev and Jenna deserved to win of these two. But here you go.

Artem’s first Mirror Ball. That’s a good thing. Because it’s COVID times, we don’t have everyone lifting Artem up. He’s probably glad about that. Congrats.

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