DWTS S022 Finals, Night One: Peta Takes the Mirror Ball

Finalists Ginger Zee and Valentin Chmerkovskiy, Peta Murgatroyd and Nyle DiMarco,
and Paige Van Zant and Mark Ballas face off.

Let me say this about that. Despite the fact that I have friends in reality TV who constantly tell me, "No, seriously, Michelle, reality TV is scripted," I choose to be selectively ignorant. I choose to believe that the reality was not that (allegedly) Caila got bumped as The Bachelorette because she was too prudish, and that JoJo just happened to fall in love with Jordan (not that he asked for her, and wouldn't do the show unless she was the Bachelorette).

I really choose to believe that shows like Survivor and Dancing with the Stars (some of the original reality shows) come at their results fairly. If they say they count millions of votes from across America, sure, I believe them. And while some folks on message boards always moan about how "Derek Hough always wins," I brush it off because it's clear to see how talented and smart (and such a great choreographer!) he is.

In short, I truly truly believe that the results on #DWTS, my favorite reality show, are real. And that winners of Mirror Balls get picked by America because they are the best of the season. One of the reasons I waited so long to write this particular blog post is because I wanted the anger to subside a bit. Because this is the first Mirror Ball that I truly question the veracity of.

And the truth of it gets into all kinds of shady gray areas, which I shall be talking about in this column.

But let's begin our two-night Finals extravaganza (aka time filler), shall we?

What used to be the flimsy concept of "let's do a dance we did earlier in the season and see how much better we do it now" has turned into the "Redemption Dance." Val incorporated elements from various dances they did during the season (which used to be part of what one did in the Freestyle). So we have the bench, the fountain, the mirrors from previous dances. Pretty cool, actually.

It is noted, however, that Ginger's major stumbling block (the lack of ability to do a character) was left out of this whole dance. No tangos or pasos here. Just lots of movement where she can smile, smile, smile. And she did.

Troupe dancers were used here, but mostly to recreate the dance from earlier in the season.

The dance ended with a really nice touch, where they are both looking back at the set pieces from the season.

JUDGES' SCORE: 28

Oh look! Sets and costumes and troupe dancers! :-X

Aside from Nyle's rampant ego and putting his foot in his mouth whenever he was allowed to speak (which really bugs me), I also just don't like his dancing. Of the final five here, Paige and Ginger and Wanya all danced up a storm, turning in perfect steps, perfect movement time after time. Antonio had issues. So, too, does Nyle. (To my eyes.)

They showed the train wreck of the Mask quickstep from earlier in the season before this dance (*shudders*). That is what they are "redeeming" themselves from. To me, it looked like Peta was dragging Nyle all through this dance. There was not the elegance and clean movement that you see from the other dancers. And I've been rewinding and watching this thing again and again.

Plus, to say nothing of the wistful look back (content) that Val just had in his Redemption dance (lacking from this dance). All three judges mention that Nyle was off time and messed up some of the footwork. (So he gets three 9s.)

They said at the beginning of this show that scoring between these three finalists "has never been tighter." And yet, we have one contestant who at this point IS STILL MESSING UP HIS FOOTWORK AND TIMING.

(Wanya's footwork and timing? Spot on. He could knock a quickstep like this right out of the park, without troupe dancers for added dressing.) Yes, I am a little peeved still that he's not a finalist, and Nyle is.

Troupe dancers used here as background to cover up Nyle's missteps.

JUDGES' SCORE: 27

But let's move on. In fact, let's recap.

Val's Redemption Song was really just a look back at their season, not a fix for anything.
Nyle and Peta's Redemption Song was marginally better than their train wreck of a Mask quickstep, yet was STILL plagued by missteps and bad timing. IN THE FINALS.
And Mark and Paige, who have absolutely presented a stellar season, with barely a misstep all season long, had to really reach for what to "redeem." So they came up with the dance where Mark hurt his back, and had to be replaced by Alan.

So we get this Fireball salsa. Stunning. (But, of course.) And, as Bruno noted, Paige not only was using the foot movements of salsa, but also the ARM movements, which most people on this show don't incorporate.

Fantastic. Just fantastic. To my eyes, EASILY the best of the three, even with the troupe dancers at the beginning. Just stunning.

Troupe dancers were used to set the flavor and to cover up the fact that she started with a black dress...

...And ends up with the sparkly red and orange one. Mark and Paige finished the rest of the dance alone, and it was brilliant.

JUDGES' SCORE: 29  (Not perfect because Len didn't think she had enough "hip action." Sigh.)

So, before we talk about the Freestyle round, let's discuss a few things.

My perception (and what the show usually leads you to believe) is that each dance throughout the season is choreographed BY the pro. I've been watching since Season 10, and there have been some questionable ones. Like Keo this season. Like Witney in the season she won with Alfonso. I have at times wondered whether or not they have help. No doubt they have the help of the showrunner and director to polish and finetune their vision. But as far as actual choreographic help, it has been understood, in fact, it's been the rules of the road, that the PRO, and ONLY the pro, choreographs the routines.

Since I've been watching, this has been true. Of course, we have Derek Hough and Mark Ballas and Valentin Chmerkovskiy (and Maksim Chmerkovskiy before him) and Sharna Burgess and Allison Holker: arguably some of the best choreographers in the world right now. They don't NEED help.

But then you have people like Sasha Farber and Keo Motsepe, maybe great dancers, but do they have the vision? Even Witney Carson, I question. Perhaps they DO need help, to get them to the finals. If, for example, Keo had managed to get all the way with someone like Jodie, wouldn't it be more fair to Jodie to bring in help to be as good as Mark Ballas is straight out of the gate? That is a quandry.

That is not what happened this season.

Here's what did happen this season. In at least two instances previously (the "silent" dance and the "blindfolded" dance), Peta had at least the assistance of Maksim Chmerkovskiy. Sure, Maks is and has been a vital part of this show. Sure, he is Peta's husband and Val's brother. Maybe he can work out the male things better than Peta with someone like Nyle. Not sure. But I do know I've never before seen an instance of ANOTHER choreographer being in there, advising on the dances. So that, in and of itself, was questionable to me. And not really fair to the other choreographers who are (ostensibly at least) struggling to create magic on the dance floor all by themselves.

Maybe you do, with one choreographer, get a lot of the same technique and steps. But so what? The "stars" not being able to dance is part of the thing. The choreographers creating their own dances is part of the thing. That is what Dancing with the Stars is.

OK, so let's look at the seminal Freestyle round, the round that makes or breaks whether you win or not.

OF COURSE, when you have a partner named Ginger, you HAVE to do a Fred Astaire type routine at some point. Valentin chose the Freestyle.

And I loved Fred and Ginger's...er, sorry... Val and Ginger's Freestyle. It was fluid and beautiful. The clothes, the sets, the dance, just wonderful.

JUDGES' SCORE: 30

Then, there's this.

First, does that look like ANY #DWTS dance you've ever seen before? No. It does not. And you know why? Because for this dance, Peta brought in an outside choreographer. (Which I believe is against the rules of this competition.) It has never been done before, and isn't fair to the other choreographers.

Peta's excuse in her package was that she "doesn't really have a lot of experience with contemporary." Well, here's a thought. Why not do the dances you ARE familiar with? This whole show is supposed to be a melding of the star who becomes dancer, and the pro who comes up with great visionary choreography. When did it become, oh, let's bring in someone from the outside to blow away everyone else? Just so very very very unfair.

And it's true, Talia's choreography is stunning. And maybe it was beyond Peta's skillset. BUT THAT'S NOT THE SHOW. That's a different show.

And the song they dance to? The Sounds of Silence. Get it? Deaf guy, Sounds of Silence? *eyeroll* It ends with each of them clasping each other's mouth.

The other thing about this dance is that Nyle didn't have to worry about pesky synchopation and keeping the beat and matching steps quickly. He just had to follow Peta's lead.

Oh, and did I mention they have an actual BURNING PIANO behind them? Actual fire.

Only the beginning of the fire.

Artistically, it was beautiful and really made a statement. For this show, though, I HATED every moment of it.

So, hey, I don't know if they lured Peta Murgatroyd back to this show by promising her the Mirror Ball at the outset, but BOY, it sure seemed like it. It sure FELT like there was a lot of manipulation going on with this win.

JUDGES' SCORE: 30

So, let's get back to the real show.

Mark Ballas, THE best actual choreographer on this show this season, gets inspiration the week before from Paige talking about the bullying she experienced, and creates a Freestyle to Somewhere Over the Rainbow (sung by his beautiful fiancee BC Jean, who can't be on this show enough, IMHO). He doesn't bring in outside choreographers. He creates this art HIMSELF.

To me, this is what a Freestyle is supposed to be. This is what WE went through this season, and here we are now. From the tough MMA fighter who was bullied by her classmates, who couldn't look in his eyes and didn't want to be lifted, to this girly girl woman who is now wearing frilly clothes and comfortable in her womanhood who owns this stage. The change is astonishing.

The dance was so beautiful. No burning pianos, but lots of poignancy. So moving, it brought Mark Ballas to tears. Really special. From the heart.

JUDGES' SCORE: 30

(SIDE NOTE: I am writing all this after the season ended. Just before the next season is to begin. I thought at the time, when Mark Ballas burst into tears, that even though he was mumbling something about Paige's journey and blah blah, that the tears weren't really from that. My feeling in that moment was that he wasn't coming back, and that this was his last competitive dance on this show.

And how poignant, as his #DWTS journey was ending, to have his new beginning, his fiancee BC Jean, right there with him. An ending and a beginning, to the tune of "Somewhere Over the Rainbow." Now, THAT's choreography.

The new cast of #DWTS Season 23 has been announced. Mark Ballas is not among them. He has not, to this moment, spoken about it in the press. I can only hope that he will do what Maks and Cheryl and Derek did, and leave AND COME BACK. To me, he is/was the heart and soul of this show. The loss of him is gut-wrenching.)

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DWTS S022 Week 5: Maks Rules The Switch Up

Nyle with his new partner Sharna, as Peta looks on.

Yeah, it's like that. There are partners (especially in this Dancing with the Stars episode of the Switch Up) that just don't bond at all. But, you also have partners that you wish were together all season long.

For example: if Jodie Sweetin were with Val C. all season, they would win. No question. But she's with Keo, who is usually lucky if he gets past Week 2. I personally don't think he has the choreography chops, the dealing with stars finesse and the long-term vision that it takes to win the Mirror Ball. Which is too bad, cause I really do think that Jodie Sweetin has the stamina and drive to win, if she were with the right partner. So it was nice to see her with Val for a week, who really worked her, and polished her technique.

Here's the other thing you should know about this Switch Up week. Remember that famous dust-up between Maksim Chmerkovskiy (when he was a dancer on DWTS) and judge Len Goodman? Heck, it turns out that you get most irritated by those who are most like you.

If you know nothing about these judges, let me clue you. Bruno is an oversexed gay man (who is wearing incredible suits lately) who often inappropriately grabs (actually both men and women, but usually men), says things to male dancers who are shirtless that would get you fired in an office, and I'm sure votes favorably for men just because they take their shirts off. But we love him anyway.

Carrie Ann is often a hot mess herself, often giggly, often falling off her chair (literally). Don't know if she's drunk or just bipolar. You give her an emotional dance, and she'll be sobbing into her voting card. Quite often her antics irritate me. But we love her anyway.

It is the stern Len Goodman, who, for me, is most often the best judge. He's judged the most ballroom competitions of these three, and it shows. He knows the rules inside and out and he knows what he's looking for. He doesn't go for all the frou-frou nonsense. And he gets booed like crazy.

The studio audience often gets swept up in the moment.

But not Len. Rules are rules, m'am. The only rule Carrie Ann consistently enforces is the "no lifts" edict. Of the guest judges they've had, the only one I really liked was the whole time period with Julianne Hough. She was tough, she was fair, and she also knew the rules (of ballroom competition).

So Maksim Chmerkovskiy coming back as a judge, sitting next to his former nemesis Len, is an odd thing. But Maks DOES know the rules too. So we had this bizarre situation this entire episode where both Len and Maks were agreeing with each other, and Carrie Ann and Bruno were gushing hot messes with each other. Len and Maks the voices of sanity? It was quite bizarre.

But I liked it. I really hope they have him back. Maks is an awesome judge.

So, let's look at the sublime successes, and the horrible trainwrecks that were Season 22's Switch Up.

The night kicks off with (again) stunning choreography by Mandy Moore. Where most of the cast is dressed in red and blue. Inexplicably, some cast members are in black outfits. Kinda strange.

At the end of it, everyone piles together, those in black more strategically hidden.

Normal Partners: Wanya and Lindsay

New Partners: Wanya and Witney

Dance: Tango

Trainwreck or Sublime: Trainwreck

Let's see. Wanya has so far been going gangbusters on this show. He's another star (like Jodie Sweetin), who's bound and determined to win this thing, works hard, knows his steps.

Also, Witney and Lindsay are supposedly best friends, yet obviously also great competitors, because Witney starts out telling her new partner: "You've been killing it, but I'm going to make you so much better this week." Wow.

But of all the pros, I'm not a big fan of Witney. The music choices she makes are often not ones I would choose. And if you can't get behind someone's music, you probably aren't going to like their dance.

So they decide to do a tango to this slow music from James Bey, performing live, since he was in between Coachellas. Don't think it was very effective, as tangos go, although Wanya was trying.

Witney's record with the Switch Up is not good. In fact, in pretty much every Switch Up she's done, she's gotten really low scores (for whatever reason). In this case, I just think Wanya and Wanya's way of working vibes better with Lindsay and her way of working.

Best Judge's Comment: (MAKS) "Tango is all about nothing moving on top, everything happening on the bottom. It felt like it was a little falling apart."

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Normal Partners: Kim and Sasha

New Partners: Kim and Keo

Dance: Viennese Waltz

Trainwreck or Sublime: Trainwreck

Mad props to the costume department on this amazing dress Kim has on.

Reminder: Keo, as a pro has never gotten this far in the competition before.

I like Kim as a competitor. I really like her partnership with Sasha (even if he doesn't really know what boobs are). And personally, I thought this was a nice dance. But, I have to agree with the judges.

Best Judge's Comment: (MAKS) "There was half a step of Viennese waltz... I can't even criticize the frame, cause there was none."

Keo goes on to try to defend himself by saying that he couldn't do a proper hold because Kim is quite a bit shorter than he is. To which Maks (properly) reminds him of Maks and Meryl (who won the Mirror Ball).

Let's examine, shall we?

Keo and Kim Viennese waltz

Maks and Meryl Viennese waltz

Look at that form! Look at all that content. Look at that Viennese Waltz. Maks is absolutely right.

Second-Best Judge's Comment: (Len) "Thank God you're here, Maks, cause it's normally me against the world."

Third-Best Judge's Comment: (Len) "Why not ONE step in hold? Not one. It's a Viennese waltz."

And then the judges break out into loud arguing, forcing wonderful host Tom Bergeron to yell, "Oh kids! Oh kids!" to break them up. (Great moment.)

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Normal Partners: Doug and Karina

New Partners: Doug and Peta

Dance: Tango

Trainwreck or Sublime: Trainwreck

BONUS POINTS: Sam Sparro's "Black and Gold" is such a great song.

I love Peta's dancing and always will, but by this point in the competition, it's obvious that Doug Flutie is not a dancer, nor ever will be. In fact, at some points, it appears that he's actually pigeon-toed.

Still, great costumes, great music, a fun watch.

Best Judge's Comment: (CARRIE ANN) "I didn't think you missed a step, and that was filled with content."

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INTERLUDE
Then, we have a segment new to the Switch Up week, where people ask questions of each other. Pretty standard stuff. Except that one of the questions is: Who do you think is going to win this season? Most people say "Me!" Sharna is actually honest (love that about her, actually), and says to new partner Nyle: "You and Wanya are right up there... I should probably say Antonio [her partner], though."

Tune in next week to see how that comment resonates with Antonio...

THEN... we have another James Bay song ("Let It Go") performed live, with Jenna and Artem dancing this amazing contemporary dance. So beautiful. Such great choreography.

Jenna and Artem amazing

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Normal Partners: Ginger and Val

New Partners: Ginger and Mark

Dance: Salsa

Trainwreck or Sublime: Sublime

Best Husband Comment: "Mark is like a nice glass of merlot. Val is a dirty martini."

Best Walk-On Ad Lib: "This is my girl, Ginger, I met her at Valentin's last week."

First, why is this husband (and baby) a character in this show?... Anyway, this was a great dance. Val and Mark are the male geniuses of this season, so Ginger is in good hands either way.

All that "Boo hoo, I just had a baby and don't know how to be sexy" nonsense is gone gone gone with this dance. She shakes, she shimmies, she does a mean salsa. (Her acting is pretty horrible, though.)

Best Judge's Comment: (MAKS) "It seemed like this might not be your thing...cause you haven't done such a fast dance yet... but it was totally your thing. You sold it, I loved it. We all had a great time."

Second-Best Husband Comment: "Mark is the marrying type. Val is more the Russian love slave."

Best Tom Bergeron Comment: "Tonight's program is brought to you by Magnanimous Russian Love Slaves."

Side note to Ginger: He tells you to sit down. Moments later, you have to get up to dance. From the moment you sat down to the moment you got up, that's acting. That part was awkward.

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Normal Partners: Antonio and Sharna

New Partners: Antonio and Karina

Dance: Cha Cha

Trainwreck or Sublime: Trainwreck

The first time I watched this, I didn't even see Antonio, Karina was so front and center in that skimpy lacy outfit. But then, that smile! Wow.

But I've already stated how little patience I have for people who have other things going on in their lives and can't rehearse. Boo hoo.

Best Judge's Comment: (LEN) "All that bump-and-grind stuff. The bits of cha cha that were in there were poor."

Second-Best Tom Bergeron Comment: "A few years ago, if you woulda told me that Maks and Len would be paddle buddies, I never woulda believed it."

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Normal Partners: Paige and Mark

New Partners: Paige and Sasha

Dance: Rumba

Trainwreck or Sublime: Sublime

PRO TIP: In Life, in Dancing, in Acting, in Sex, looking someone directly in the eyes is a very powerful thing. Glad that Sasha was breaking down Paige's walls in this rumba.

Sasha asked her why she wasn't looking in his eyes. She answered that she doesn't really look anyone in their eyes. (Although she did, somewhat, in this dance.)

Beautiful costume, beautiful dance. Not a lot of rumba content in it, however.

Sasha has the same problem that Keo has. He has never been tested with his choreography. He has never gotten this far as a pro. He is maybe not aware of how much the judges score for content.

Best Judge's Comment: (MAKS) "With a lot of ability comes a lot of responsibility... You are more than capable of winning the show."

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Normal Partners: Von and Witney

New Partners: Von and Lindsay

Dance: Jive

Trainwreck or Sublime: Trainwreck

Personally, I liked this better than any dance he's danced. But any kicks and flicks were non-existent. Lindsay did an amazing job dancing all around him, however. And the choreography was stunning.

Best Judge's Comment: (MAKS) "Lindsay gets an 11 for all of this."

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Normal Partners: Nyle and Peta

New Partners: Nyle and Sharna

Dance: Viennese Waltz

Trainwreck or Sublime: Sublime

Sharna is a dancer who, although she's never yet won, knows what it takes to get to Second Place in this competition. She packs her dances full of content to get those judges' points. I really hope she wins someday. This was, by far, the better Viennese Waltz of the night. Hope Keo learned a few things by watching this one. (Keo and Kim got a 28 out of 40 for theirs, this one received a 37 out of 40.) It was, by judges' scores, the best dance of the night. None of them thanked Sharna's stunning choreography, but that's why this received such high scores.

Sharna and Nyle Viennese Waltz

Best Judge's Comment: (LEN) "That was like a total eclipse. It don't turn up often, but when it does, it's FANTASTIC."

And then, an odd thing happened. Apparently, when the judges have their scores, they pass them on a piece of paper (what? in 2016?) to the control room, who uses them for the graphics on screen. However, when they raised their paddles, both Maks and Bruno voted 10s. Even though they had told the control room "9." So, they were only scored 37 because that was the official score. (Still the best score of the night.)

Also, you'd think after 22 seasons of this show they'd have figured this out...

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Normal Partners: Jodie and Keo

New Partners: Jodie and Val

Dance: Paso Doble

Trainwreck or Sublime: Sublime

This dance encapsulates why Switch-Up Week is necessary. These stars rely upon their pros to pack their routines with content, and to be hard on them to execute that content properly. They have to run the gauntlet of these judges (and get their approval), PLUS, they have to win the hearts of the American people to get their votes. They are relying on their pros to get them there.

Derek Hough has won the most Mirror Ball trophies because he is the best at that. At delivering appetizing choreographic content (to new songs, even though they are ostensibly the same dances) for the judges, as well as making his partners look good, no matter how much they may be struggling with his steps.

Keo Motsepe, I would argue, has shown in this episode (and last week's fiasco with Jodie) that he is clueless about making his partner look good. His dances are nowhere near filled with the amount of content one needs to win this thing. And what sucks most about that is that Jodie Sweetin could WIN this. If she had Mark Ballas or Val Chmerkovskiy or Derek Hough as her partner, she would win, no question. The fact that she is still in Week 5 (and going forward) is due to her, not due to Keo's choreography or talent.

Because LOOK! Look at what she does with Val as her partner. They attempt a paso doble (very difficult dance), packed full of choreography. And she executes what one judge calls "her best dance." Of course. Cause now she knows what it takes.

How horrible it must be for Jodie, going forward, to have to go back to Keo, who doesn't have Val's skill. I almost think that Jodie could win this on her own. I hope she at least makes the finals.

I was talking to a fellow DWTS watcher, and we were speculating on what Keo Motsepe's Freestyle would look like. I cannot imagine. He has nowhere near the creativity to come up with a good one, let alone a great one. Makes me very sad for Jodie. I will be pumping all of my votes to Jodie (no matter how bad Keo's dances are) because she deserves to win this.

But in the meanwhile, we had this exquisite paso with Val, which shows what Jodie Sweetin truly can do.

Best Judge's Comment: (MAKS) "Amazing. You could be all the way in the Finale. Great job."

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Because everyone is with different partners this week, there is no elimination.

MICHE'S FAVORITES FOR SWITCH-UP WEEK, WEEK 5
1. Val and Jodie (paso doble)
2. Sharna and Nyle (Viennese waltz)
3. Mark and Ginger (salsa)
4. Sasha and Paige ("rumba")
5. Karina and Antonio (cha cha)

Did you know that Jodie was the first girl that Val "fell in love with before [he] knew English"? Maybe he can keep giving poor Jodie a few pointers on the side?

MICHE"s DREAM FINALE GROUP (no order)
Val and Ginger
Jodie and Keo
Mark and Paige
Sharna and Antonio
Wanya and Lindsay

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DWTS S22 Week 2: Not Very Sexy Latin Night

This, from the opening number of Week 2, choreographed by "the birthday girl, Mandy Moore." First, let's say HAPPY BIRTHDAY, Mandy Moore, and DWTS got infinitely better once you started choreographing so many of its numbers.

But, oh what to say about Week 2 on Dancing with the Stars, Latin Night? First, the good news. Geraldo Rivera is voted out. But second, there were really no steamy Latin dances tonight. But there were many good, even great ones. So, let's break it down in order.

This was the dance that made me sit up and go, "Wow! JODIE and Keo could win this!" What a luscious samba. And that gold! Both her outfit (stunning) and all the really cool gold paint on Keo, to say nothing of his hot pants... Wow, was this amazing to watch.

I quite like Marla Maples and Tony Dovolani as a team. But still, upon second viewing, she does seem a bit awkward and stiff. She hit all the standard Argentine tango moves, but it's a complicated dance, and it didn't flow from her. Still I liked them.

Then... UGH... then, we had this.

Ugh. In all the seasons I've been watching DWTS, I've never ONCE seen someone dressed up as someone else. This isn't SNL, for gosh sakes. So this moron decides to come out like this... UGH... and in his package, he talks about how he has "no feeling in his right foot." (Why do they let these idiots do DWTS? Plenty of people with complete feeling who wanna do this show... UGH.) Horrible dance.

So, personally, I couldn't get rid of him fast enough. Sheesh. (Poor Edyta.)

This, however, was followed by one of the best dances of the night, choreographed by the brilliant Mark Ballas. Sadly not danced by him, however. :-(  He had hurt his back in rehearsal, so Alan stepped in for him, and did an amazing job.

Mark Ballas always does amazing choreography. Week 2. Paige and Alan.

Boys just don't know what to do when they are forced to dance a rumba with the luscious and lovely Miss Sharna Burgess. Antonio Brown tried. He did.

And he danced the dance, but was often felled by what he tactfully called, "Blood flow." Blood flow, indeed.

On the opposite end of the spectrum, here's Sasha dancing with curvy Kim Fields. I really enjoyed this dance, and watching these two in general.

Peta and Nyle tackle a rumba that Len thought was rushed, but Carrie Ann thought was "stunning."

Then, there was this dreadfulness. This woman may be beautiful, but she sure cannot dance. This song (Pata Pata) was one of the most danceable songs ever written, and she still seemed like she was walking through it. No musicality or sense of beat at all. Ugh. Who can't dance to Pata Pata? C'mon.

Mischa tries to explain the bad performance away by saying that she couldn't hear the music. And that when the live band played, "everything changed." Bruno: "So THAT's what happened..." Carrie Ann laughs and turns her head away.

Folks, it was terrible. No excuses.

The judges showed their 5 paddles again (for her and 4s for Geraldo) in response.

So there was the whole "Barbie drill sergeant" thing. And the whole "being late = $100" and the "I'm charging for farts" thing. Witney is gonna be a rich woman. (Witney is donating the money to the Skin Cancer Foundation.) Oh, and it's a "whole lot more expensive in the locker room." :-0  Things you don't know about football players... *sigh*

But it was more hip hop. Not my favorite dance of the night.

Wanya continues to show us why he's one of the top competitors in this competition (with Lindsay), knocking this salsa right out of the park. The costumes and camera angles really worked together with this one, showcasing every last movement. Great great stuff here.

Keep it going, Wanya!

Karina and Doug did an incredible paso doble. Strong dance, great music, wonderful costumes and lighting. Good stuff.

With Karina's great choreography, and the fabulous troupe dancers, Doug Flutie became a contender with this dance.

MICHE'S FAVORITE DANCES OF WEEK 2, LATIN NIGHT

1. Wanya and Lindsay (salsa)
2. Paige and Alan (Mark) (salsa)
3. Jodie and Keo (samba)
4. Ginger and Val (samba)
5. Doug and Karina (paso doble)
6. Antonio and Sharna (rumba)
7. Marla and Tony (Argentine tango)
8. Kim and Sasha (salsa)

OH THANK GOD
1. Geraldo Rivera's Elimination

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